Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: plot help-galactic

  1. #1
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668

    plot help-galactic

    Ah so now that I've done some thinking (and some growing up) I think I can finally say I have a steady base plot...
    Please give me feedback,like what important questions would the reader have, stuff like that.

    It's in the future, where humans have advanced far into technology and have met other races. It is called the Technological Revolution(Like the Industrial Revolution) So humans have evolved over time too right? Now the humans live on the planet of Atari and on this planet is the Universal Academy. Here comes people from all other galaxy's to become Galaxy Defenders, like the universe's police. It centers on one class The Dangerous and Strange Abilities Class 3, and their adventures. ^^

  2. #2
    999 Knights Member Matt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    1,357
    That's a decent base plot; however, it might be good to add some conflict in there--something to overshadow your heroes and heroines throughout their adventures.

  3. #3
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668
    Well many of the people in the class are treated like political objects because they have such dangerous powers.
    The main charachter is also supposed to suffer from amnesia and have an evil twin brother. Kinda like.. Star Wars? I AM YOUR FATHER.

  4. #4
    Super Senior Member Celestial-Fox's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Alaska
    Posts
    2,080
    So it's like a sci-fi transhumanism story? That sounds interesting. Yet Matt's point stands--this isn't a plot; it's a premise. What's missing is conflict, but it seems like you've got a few sources to draw from for that. The conflict could be the amnesiac trying to regain his identity whilst his twin tries to destroy it. Or maybe there's a power struggle in the team? Or a traitor?

    It's all up to you, really.

    But in all honesty, it sounds really, really interesting, and I'd definitely give it a read. (D'aww, how cute and alliterative I am. XD)

  5. #5
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668
    I already had all of those in, I just didn't type the whole plot out because I thought someone wouldn't read it.

  6. #6
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668
    Ok I decided to suck it up and put up the three plotways I decided to go with.

    A) The main charachter Ace is kicked out of basically every school because he cannot control his powers. Whenever he sneezes, holds his breath, or is surprised he time travels.(which causes for some extermley strange situations) His father, who is good friends with the Dean of the Universal Academy let's him join the Academy so he can learn how to control his powers
    B)After defeating a bunch of Bank Robbers Ace decides to join the academy and become a Universal Defender, the highest level of ... fighting justice? Think of Naruto wanting to become Hokage
    C) Ace suffers from amnesia and is unaware of his powers. His "father" helps him get into the Academy. There he slowly learns secrets about who he really is....
    D) An action comedy about kids who are universal police. Think Gintama. No real plot but so wierd and bendy it works.

  7. #7
    Super Senior Member Delphinus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    2,301
    Why are people saying this is unique? It's a high school story in a science-fiction setting.
    "The main character is also supposed to suffer from amnesia and have an evil twin brother."

    That's two overdone clichés in a single sentence. In addition the whole 'academy for SPECIAL PEOPLE' premise has been done to death over the last few decades. I'm not saying it can't be done well, just that from the premise it seems absurdly unlikely that it's going to be anything other than a massive orgy of overblown tropes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fenn
    You forgot your F in Modesty.

  8. #8
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668
    People have been saying this is unique? Huh.
    How do you make a cliche special is basically what you're saying, right?

  9. #9
    Super Senior Member Delphinus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    2,301
    Yeah. I'm not saying an overdone concept like this can't be done well, but without massive subversion of what the audience expects and some sort of deconstruction (see: GAINAX), it's going to turn into X-Men in space, which is neither interesting nor original at this point. Unless you explicitly plan on attacking the underlying assumptions of the concept ("policemen are good", "powers are desirable", "with great power comes great responsibility", etc.) then it's probably safer to leave this to get lost in space.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fenn
    You forgot your F in Modesty.

  10. #10
    Devilish Member Slurpee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    668
    I need something that sets this story out from the rest. But by Gainax does that mean that you want me to troll my audience? I know Gainax takes some pretty overused plots but I'm not seeing what that has to do with this.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •