I swear, my boobs itch so much right now.
Yeah. I had set up this nice conspiracy plot in this small village & the dummies didn't surrender their weapons to the regular guardsmen at the gate ( who were not evil & just doing their job). The guards put the non-leathal beat down on them, you know trying to 'contain & control'. But the PC wizard decides to cast scorching ray & out right merked like three of the guards! So all that non-lethal crap got real. Party's level 11 & the guards were level three. At 1st, I had planned only to have 4 guards, but that four turned into 20 (Just kept them pouring out the gate like puddys). The archers atop the gate tower HAD longbows but I gave 'em balistas. Of course I made the caiptian of the guard level 15 (was like lvl 8 at 1st). the cheat was his infinite hit points.
It was like an episode of Power Rangers gone terribly wrong. My Pcs were all like, "Hey! You can't keep guard coming out the gate lake that!" and, "What do you mean an attack roll of 32 doesn't hit?!! What the hell is the Capt's touch AC?!!" then, "Not cool Shagg...just not cool man.." and, "WHERE THE HELL DID THOSE BALISTA WITH FIRE ENCHANTMENTS ON THEM COME FROM?!!! SERIOUSLY?!!"
And I was all like "Ha! You beeches got served by the guard 'cuz your all supposed to be good & the guards aint evil. Your cleric should 've cast detect evil or know alignment. Shit, why didn't you just give up your arms? I'd given 'em back. That's stanard procedure for guards. WFT you dunb asses?!! You just wasted 3 hours of my life with this stupid shit. That's how preteens role-play. Be a man & grow grow some balls." and then, "we'll redo this crap next week & just let them have your fuckin' weapons or, next time you'll be rolling new dudes."
Everyone was mad but I gives a fuck.
Damn. I just realized just how massive of a nerd I am...
Last edited by Black_Shaggie; 03-21-2013 at 01:17 PM.
Use sand paper, that should work
With a buzz saw for added shine
put some lotion on ur titties they probs itch cuz they dry
alright no thanks for my sage advice whateva im not upset over here or anything