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Thread: The Problem Thread

  1. #311
    Sir-Mass-a-Lot Sylux's Avatar
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    Bacon I don't think people in general are good for the relationship thing. Have you ever seen the type of guy who really argues his points strongly, but only when really warranted, and ends up striking everyone down for his super powerful smite? It's fun for that guy, but think of this guy trying to have a really serious relationship. He'll end up over asserting his dominance and shy down his woman, and this isn't what he asked for. However, if he gets rid of the idea that he wants a real relationship and instead determines for pleasure, he can essentially win guaranteed. In the end, it is all up to you what you want. Analyze your personality, and envision if it can cause some relationship angst between you and yer partner. If it can, maybe you wanna just go for the detached route and basically lay-and-leave. Or lay-and-have-leave. If you're just too cool of a dude to make people feel bad then do a relationship. Either way will be good for you, but honestly a real relationship will be best in the long run, even if it's just a recipe for disaster. You learn a shitload from those things.

  2. #312
    Zeta Members ram's Avatar
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    urgh..... I drank too much green tea, been drinking about 3 litters per day in the past weeks.

    and I just researched in google of any side effects in might cause me and now I understand why my stomach has been acting strange...
    I think I might die anytime soon....

  3. #313
    I've become very lazy, since last month, if that counts as a problem 0_0
    I sleep up to 14 hours a day XD on an average between 10-12.
    AND I make one sketch per week instead of my usual 3 per day >.>

    Yes, I've got my holidays on right now

  4. #314
    One Thousand Member Renzokuken's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bacon_Barbarian View Post
    They were dating someone else for 2.5 years. If she's was happy with her BF, which she was, I'm not going to mess up her relationship. I'm not some sort of spiteful creep. And as said, I'll wait till she mellows out a bit.
    I could argue here that if you really wanted her, you'd fight for her regardless of the fact that she's in a relationship or not. There's no point standing on the sidelines hoping that something will happen. D:

  5. #315
    Lord of Death jubeh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Renzokuken View Post
    I could argue here that if you really wanted her, you'd fight for her regardless of the fact that she's in a relationship or not. There's no point standing on the sidelines hoping that something will happen. D:
    Do you really believe this renzokuken.

    Edit: Wow at some questionable advice in this thread. Bacon you are friend zoned. As much as I hate to say it, delphinus is right. You're in love with an idea, not a person and that's a bubble you need to pop.

    Second, why is it okay to become friends with somebody when your main objective isn't that you want to be friends with them. I'm no moral guru but ask yourself this before you start an expedition to get in some girls pants that starts from being friends.

    Cype is also right. Relationships are the worst. Are you even considering what its going to be like if she actually does like you. Ughh.

    Bacon, for your sake I hope this works out with you failing horribly. Not because I want to see you upset, but because I think letting a girl slip away that you've put on a pedestal is a really important thing to experience.

    Also one last thing

    Maybe if she knew that ... But I'm pretty sure she doesn't. I'm pretty good at hiding that sort of thing.
    Lots of people I know say they're good at acting sober while they're drunk. You know why they say that? Because they're drunk -- they have no idea what they're acting like.
    Last edited by jubeh; 12-08-2011 at 04:09 PM.

  6. #316
    Ying Yang Member Peteman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Delphinus View Post
    @Bacon Barbarian
    That's blatant nice-guy behaviour.
    So how exactly does a nice guy get rid of these insecurities? Over much soul searching over past years I've come to realise how much my insecurities have affected my entire life. Nowadays they are comparitively minor, but as a kid I was the one who would get teased because I'd get wound up and react. The need for approval from other people, or unconsiously viewing other people as 'higher' than yourself affects all your relationships and decision making. I find that it's difficult to motivate myself if what I'm doing doesn't affect other people or I'm working alone; this has affected my school work in the past. Now that I'm more consious of it it's easier to deal with. But it affects all of your behaviour in such subtle ways.

    Peteman

  7. #317
    Sir-Mass-a-Lot Sylux's Avatar
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    Jubeh's advice is always best advice

  8. #318
    Ruler of the Seventh Empire GunZet's Avatar
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    Yea man, like, relationships are horrible. NEVER get into one, no matter how awesome that other person is.

  9. #319
    Sir-Mass-a-Lot Sylux's Avatar
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    Yeah the most people are good for is basically having sex with or being friends with. Exclusive friendship was a bad idea.

  10. #320
    Super Senior Member Delphinus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GunZet View Post
    Yea man, like, relationships are horrible. NEVER get into one, no matter how awesome that other person is.
    Kinda think Jubeh meant in Bacon's case rather than in general. Also you're picking and choosing bits from his post to try and discredit the whole thing, which is naughty.

    Quote Originally Posted by Peteman
    So how exactly does a nice guy get rid of these insecurities? Over much soul searching over past years I've come to realise how much my insecurities have affected my entire life. Nowadays they are comparitively minor, but as a kid I was the one who would get teased because I'd get wound up and react. The need for approval from other people, or unconsiously viewing other people as 'higher' than yourself affects all your relationships and decision making. I find that it's difficult to motivate myself if what I'm doing doesn't affect other people or I'm working alone; this has affected my school work in the past. Now that I'm more consious of it it's easier to deal with. But it affects all of your behaviour in such subtle ways.
    BRIEF(ISH) ANECDOTE

    I'm not sure. In my case I dealt with my insecurities about life, which came about from my parents' divorce and my disadvantaged background, at a fairly young age. The 'disadvantaged background' was, of course, relative: I went to a good school in a pretty affluent area, so most of the other pupils were pretty squarely middle class, while my family, especially when my father left, were definitely working class. I didn't have the nice things the other kids had, which made me feel pretty insecure. Relative deprivation is a bitch.

    What happened was that I convinced myself of my own enormous superiority. I was near the top of the class in most things (to the point where I had a reading age of 24 at age 11 and got put in special classes for maths - algebra at 7, woo!), so it wasn't a huge step for me to take or anything. I deliberately gave myself the upper-class accent I still have. Lack of social interaction made it worse, to the point of full-blown narcissism by the time I reached secondary school. These people were unworthy of what they had, I thought - I should be living the life of luxury because I was so much better than them. So I got bullied a lot because of that.

    The narcissism is something I'm only recently starting to get over. There's definitely some sort of underlying inferiority complex there, but really the same things that allow me to conquer feelings of superiority work equally well against the inferiority complex.

    END ANECDOTE

    If you have issues with inferiority, compare yourself to other people less and focus on your own targets. If you have to compare yourself to other people, do it in a realistic way - look at people who are better than you as inspiration, not impossible targets or deities or 'geniuses'. On the other hand, you can feel great looking at people who are worse at a particular skill than you, especially if you recognise your past self in them - it really lets you see the progress you've made. It's even better when you can see professionals who are less skilled than you in their chosen field. Set yourself goals, identify the way to reach those goals, and do it without compromise. Compromise is for the mediocre. Ignore people who try and deter you from your goals, but listen to people who might have better ideas on how to accomplish them.

    That's just my 5 cents.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fenn
    You forgot your F in Modesty.

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