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Thread: Kami's work :)

  1. #11
    ハリセン クラプ Ace Pitcher Hayashida's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ram View Post
    http://www.mangatutorials.com/forum/...p-for-critique.

    You could atleast look it up on his older post, it's just 50
    Yeah, Kamisoyokaze should have looked for their old thread and posted there, though it's a bit too late for that. They can keep using this thread and let that other one go.
    Don't backseat mod by the way. If there's any kind of problem in this subforum, the assigned moderator (Gunzet) will take care of it.

  2. #12
    Zeta Members ram's Avatar
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    @Kamisoyokaze, you know there are a lot of valuable critiques in that old thread like hamachi's link and some of nisaren and Ged pointed out.

    and those critiques didn't seem to reach you when I look at this new drawing of yours, it's such a shame that you didn't just revived that thread.

    The only advice that I'd like to give you for now is that you should review again what they said in that last thread.
    that's all.

  3. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by JJJorgie View Post
    It's still bent it a way that would mean it was broken.
    I can do that position with my leg o.O

    Quote Originally Posted by ram View Post
    @Kamisoyokaze, you know there are a lot of valuable critiques in that old thread like hamachi's link and some of nisaren and Ged pointed out.

    and those critiques didn't seem to reach you when I look at this new drawing of yours, it's such a shame that you didn't just revived that thread.

    The only advice that I'd like to give you for now is that you should review again what they said in that last thread.
    that's all.
    I haven't disregarded those critiques, on the contrary I still remember them and try to do them, I also have all the resources people directed to me in that thread and others saved to my pc For example you linked me to some proportion guides, I actually used them in drawing this most recent one

    I'll read through it again though to make sure I didn't miss anything off. Cheers
    Last edited by kamisoyokaze; 06-18-2012 at 01:24 AM.

  4. #14
    Ruler of the Seventh Empire GunZet's Avatar
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    Due to this thread already being so far along, it'd be kind of inconvenient to merge this with the old. So I'll let this one fly as a 'reboot' thread. But remember, one thread per person, even if it's super old- if you have one, grab the shovel and dig a bit.

    Besides all that jazz, I'll hit you up with a crit in a bit.
    <My comic
    .................................................. ......................."Mind-controlling you into thinking this is awesome."

  5. #15
    Here's some more: A sketch here, tried to make it less skinny this time :P I also tried to make her look like she's leaning forward, I don't know how successful this is but it would probably help it if i coloured and shaded it.



    And a doodle I did at school today :L I think the face is too high up on the head, and the neck is too long, but i can fix that on the pc later. It's a murderous doll fyi...


    Quote Originally Posted by GunZet View Post
    Due to this thread already being so far along, it'd be kind of inconvenient to merge this with the old. So I'll let this one fly as a 'reboot' thread. But remember, one thread per person, even if it's super old- if you have one, grab the shovel and dig a bit.

    Besides all that jazz, I'll hit you up with a crit in a bit.
    Cheers, I figured as my old post is so old and all the pictures in it have broken I should start a new one... Sorry.
    Last edited by kamisoyokaze; 06-18-2012 at 11:58 AM.

  6. #16
    999 Knights Member JJJorgie's Avatar
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    On the first picture: Since she's leaning forward and looking up, you'll want to lower her head a little more (in this pose, you shouldn't be able to see the neck). You should probably make the feet a bit bigger. Also, there are no clearly defined shoulder, so it makes the arms looks a bit odd. This is a bit of a stylistic thing, but eyes shouldn't slat down.

    On the second picture, I see you went back to the old thread Overall, it's pretty good. The hands and feet look a bit small, though.

    Hope this helps!

  7. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by JJJorgie View Post
    On the first picture: Since she's leaning forward and looking up, you'll want to lower her head a little more (in this pose, you shouldn't be able to see the neck). You should probably make the feet a bit bigger. Also, there are no clearly defined shoulder, so it makes the arms looks a bit odd. This is a bit of a stylistic thing, but eyes shouldn't slat down.

    On the second picture, I see you went back to the old thread Overall, it's pretty good. The hands and feet look a bit small, though.

    Hope this helps!
    Ah I didn't think about that head position, big help, thanks! I know there's no clearly defined shoulder, this is somethign I tried to fix and failed horribly at and I'm not sure what to do about it. Up ill make the feet bigger.

    Hehe, as I said before, I never forgot what was in the old thread, actually for this, it had nothing to do with the old thread, I was bored in physics and somehow my mind wondered to the horror anime "another" in which i remembered the dolls, so I wanted to draw a horror themed doll. Then I remembered a resource on my computer (which actually came from my old thread) and so based it off that, but I had to do it from memory.

  8. #18
    999 Knights Member Matt's Avatar
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    Top picture:

    First thing I noticed is that her chin is really pointy. Looking at the anatomy behind that, she wouldn't even have room for her bottom teeth. Yes, yes, this is anime, but most anime at least allows for some sort of semirealistic skull. Moving down, her boobs shouldn't be pressed together like that if she's leaning over unless her top is really constricting. From the way it's drawn, I take it it's not. They should be slightly lower and a bit looser. Sort of like this.

    Also, I can't critique all of them exactly, but grab a reference photo of a person wearing the same type of clothing as you want your character wearing. Ink in the more prominent folds using your reference. As it is, it looks like you know where the folds should go, but aren't hitting the right look for them.

    Bottom picture:

    Her face isn't too far up, I don't think. If you were going for realism, that'd be closer to what you'd want. As it is, I think what you're seeing as awkward may be the way her human face and hair contrast with a mannequin's body.

  9. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by Matt View Post
    Top picture:

    First thing I noticed is that her chin is really pointy. Looking at the anatomy behind that, she wouldn't even have room for her bottom teeth. Yes, yes, this is anime, but most anime at least allows for some sort of semirealistic skull. Moving down, her boobs shouldn't be pressed together like that if she's leaning over unless her top is really constricting. From the way it's drawn, I take it it's not. They should be slightly lower and a bit looser. Sort of like this.

    Also, I can't critique all of them exactly, but grab a reference photo of a person wearing the same type of clothing as you want your character wearing. Ink in the more prominent folds using your reference. As it is, it looks like you know where the folds should go, but aren't hitting the right look for them.

    Bottom picture:

    Her face isn't too far up, I don't think. If you were going for realism, that'd be closer to what you'd want. As it is, I think what you're seeing as awkward may be the way her human face and hair contrast with a mannequin's body.
    Thanks for the CC, I see thanks, Ill try to redraw it like on that picture. As for my clothing model I have this http://cdn04.cdn.justjaredjr.com/wp-...-2010-vmas.jpg

    Yeah I think you may be right, I may be able to fix that with colour, idk, Ill see where it takes me!

  10. #20
    I tried changing the first on in order to meet critique how is it now?

    Last edited by kamisoyokaze; 06-18-2012 at 03:59 PM.

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