Demon's Critique Collection

**Demonfyre** · 06-09-2012, 06:47 PM

@Raikov - Thanks for that very detailed critique

and i'm glad you like my artstyle

I see there is still lots of shading for me to work on and i'll keep that in mind when I next do a colour render

also can I ask what I use the small circles I use to divide up the main circle for the head? Is that what I use to establish the width of the arms? Also sorry, i'm usually sloppy with my shading and lighting because i'm usually more concerned about correcting all my flaws with the initial drawings themselves.

---

Rena Kunisaki:

Yes I am aware that the waist and body in general is very thin, this is due to the reference I used being like that and also... well, the head height of the reference was actually 5 and I drew it out in 6 and didn't notice until I literally had finished it >.> so it will also appear elongated :/ also i'm not sure what is wrong with the hair... but it gives me a weird feeling when I look at it :/

Anatomy Practice Session 2:

More anatomy practice

also I have 2 questions for anyone that reads this:

1) Am I missing out any important details on my anatomy practice?
2) My anatomy sketches are all 6 heads tall, should I change this to 7/8 so its more like the proper human proportions or will it be fine as 6?

**WhenRabbitsAttack** · 06-10-2012, 03:06 AM

well done, james! your males look much more masculine

the anatomy sketches look good, but i wonder if you might try adding in abs to your males next time?
the kneeling female sketch looks odd, and i think it might be because her waist goes in to much. at an angle like that, the waist would appear wider and there would be a few rolls.
and you're missing the ankles in your sketches. the should be represented as a small bump on the sides of the lower leg with the inner ankle slightly higher than the outside.

your character rena is adorable. the reason the hair looks weird is because she has no one clearly defined parting.
the angle of her shoulder that is closest to us is also slightly wrong.

**Shadowsfade** · 06-10-2012, 07:30 AM

I really like the top picture

I still think you're drawing arms too thin, especially the upper arm. the male arms above are an improvement, but both the girls' still seem too thin - especially the first one, (our) right arm goes to a point and virtually disappears just before the elbow, then suddenly balloons out,with the lower arm wider in general than the upper arm - try making your upper arms a bit wider in general

they're a much better size in that first pic of Rena

**Demonfyre** · 06-10-2012, 09:44 AM

@Mereana - Ok I'll try to add abs in today

and yeah I keep messing up with that particular pose with the woman kneeling down :/ but that's the best one so far, I'll try it again maybe to get it right

an with the hair do you mean I need to part it more, or make the parting more obvious? Thanks for clarifying I'm getting the details correct

@Shadowsfade - Thanks and I'll try to beef out those arms further in my next sketches

thanks for posting

**JJJorgie** · 06-10-2012, 10:52 AM

Congradulations, Demonfyre! You're really improving! What I was gonna to say has already been said, so there's just an encouraging "Good job!" from me

To you and WRA: Demonfyre's drawing of Rena's hair matches up almost exactly with his references (the cover of .hack//Legend of the Twilight, I'm assuming)

**Demonfyre** · 06-10-2012, 04:33 PM

^ Yup that was the major reference, and a couple of Rena drawings from Book 1

and thanks

I was worried the conversion from 5 to 6 heads would have made it look bad :/

**Gedeon** · 06-10-2012, 04:43 PM

One thing i would tell you to fix (if it isn't done purposely) is your proportions. The last anatomy practices have good anatomy but weird proportions. Other then that pretty solid.