Demon's Critique Collection

**JJJorgie** · 08-21-2012, 08:52 PM

Beautiful, beautiful!!! Your improvement is great!!! (The first one's breasts crack me up

)

On the new one: it kind of looks like she's shrugging, which isn't necessarily bad or anything, but if you want a more relaxed look, try sloping the shoulders down more. Also, the knees looks a little odd. Maybe try not the curve them inwards when they meet the thighs. Lastly, I think the upper arms should be a little thicker.

Overall, I really like it. The shading looks great!

**Demonfyre** · 08-22-2012, 04:03 AM

Thanks JJ

and yeah, I drew breasts terribly :L

With the shrugging thing, the reason I made it look like that is because the original pose was like that so I just made it the same

but yeah I will keep sloping the shoulders in mind for future poses

I will fix up those knees

and the arms were deliberately thinned a bit more, personally I think they look a bit better like that but I will look into it

Thanks for the feedback

**ScarletHue** · 08-22-2012, 06:27 AM

As far as the breasts go, I think it's that her right breast lacks form. It doesn't seem like a breast but rather, a curly line. What I'm trying to say is, that the shape you've drawn doesn't seem to symbolize the object it's meant to be. At least in my mind.

**Demonfyre** · 08-22-2012, 11:29 AM

Originally Posted by ScarletHue

As far as the breasts go, I think it's that her right breast lacks form. It doesn't seem like a breast but rather, a curly line. What I'm trying to say is, that the shape you've drawn doesn't seem to symbolize the object it's meant to be. At least in my mind.

Hmm, should I try removing the breast lines and then shade and value it and see if I can give it proper form this time round?

Maybe a better question is, how can I go about giving it better 'form'? Thanks for posting

**Demonfyre** · 08-24-2012, 06:40 PM

Succubus

This design I do not own, this was a request thing I did on DA

SPOILER! :

And I will throw in the nude model I used for the clothes as well

Sketches.

**nisaren** · 08-25-2012, 11:45 AM

The folds on the succubus's clothes don't look quite right. I think you need to decide whether she's wearing a t-shirt or a heavy sweatshirt. The way you drew the folds it looks like she's wearing a loose fitting sweatshirt, but at the shoulders and neck it's a t-shirt. She also looks like she's wearing loose fitting sweat pants. I took the liberty to draw an example of a tighter fitting t-shirt and pants. After all... she's a succubus... and they usually aren't wearing much at all. :X

When drawing folds I find it useful to imagine how the clothing follows the pull of gravity. Where does it hit first, where will it collect. The latter tells you where the folds will originate and the former tells you in which direction those folds will go.

SPOILER! :

**JJJorgie** · 08-25-2012, 04:02 PM

The far wings is placed oddly. The close one is pointed backwards, while the far one is coming toward the front. The far one you should be pointed backwards, too, so you probably won't be able tp see hardly any of it.

**Demonfyre** · 08-25-2012, 06:10 PM

@Nisaren - Thanks for pointing that out about the clothing, and I wasn't to sure myself what type of clothes she is suposed I be wearing, the character design looked like a baggy t-shirt and jogging bottoms but it is hard to tell from what the requester gave me to use as reference :/ and I will try to think about clothing in that way, I found a useful image about clothing and where it collects, I'll see if I can improve on clothing

thanks for posting

And yeah :P as I said mentioned though, it's not my design so I was obliged to follow the character design of the requester, even though as you pointed out Succubus tend to wear minimal clothing xD

@JJ - Oh I see what you mean, can't believe I made such a simple mistake >.> I will see if that can be rectified

thanks for posting

**-Al** · 08-26-2012, 02:17 AM

great design.. i like the sword :]
as with the wings the horns too seem a lil out of perspective. if you consider the pose the right horn(our right) should be further back and small as the head is a tad tilted. right now it seems as if viewed from the front. try to understand the form of the object you are drawing.

i see a lot of improvement!

**Demonfyre** · 08-26-2012, 09:28 AM

Originally Posted by -Al

great design.. i like the sword :]
as with the wings the horns too seem a lil out of perspective. if you consider the pose the right horn(our right) should be further back and small as the head is a tad tilted. right now it seems as if viewed from the front. try to understand the form of the object you are drawing.

i see a lot of improvement!

Thanks!

I will make sure to pay more attention to the perspective of the horns and other objects placed on the head in general

thanks for posting!