No, I mean a dickbag. Dick-bag. Dickbag.
It's like a bag of dicks.
Originally Posted by Fenn
See John it's like this
Originally Posted by Fenn
Im actually quite bitchy now as an effect of dramatic changes this year, not necessarily a flaw when needed but I'd like to be nice again...
Short attention span/ Heavy procrastinator
I have bad sleeping habits.
Horrible girlfriend (sometimes) heh
I don't go out and speak to people much because I'm afraid of what they might think of me.
I am actually Roy Mustang.
Showed up to class an hour early on accident so had time to write this.
I am extremely narcissistic. I find my face to be attractive and get excited when people in the media look similar to me. I require constant validation for my looks but act like I don't care.
I am terrified of the idea that somebody could love me so I become attracted to people who are indifferent to me and whom I have no chance with. Despite being aware there is no possible future with these people, I get jealous and emotional regarding them.
I am emotionally weak. I cry often for no reason and get hurt by cruel jokes even tho I often inflect them on others. I act like an asshole to prevent the slightest chance of somebody tampering with my feelings. Despite this, I will use people who find me attractive to get what I want.
I crave misery. I find happiness uncomfortable and unstable. While happy I can only imagine the next "bad thing". If it doesn't happen I inevitably begin to sabotage opportunities to be happy.
I become emotionally invested in people far too easily and become upset when they don't feel the same way platonically. If somebody doesn't talk to me in a while I assume I'm not important to them and cultivate resentment. Despite this I often ignore people I like for no reason at all.
I am a disgusting pervert. I don't joke about it anymore because I don't find it particularly funny, but the stuff I'm in to is just awful.
I am stone cold obsessed with suicide. I literally cannot thing of a time where I wasn't. I say it's because I want to raise awareness and prevent the act, but I spent a lot of time and energy finding ways to justify it.
I haven't had a real relationship since highs school and even then it only lasted 6 months. If a relationship seems like its gonna work, I sabotage it somehow.
I cause mental and physical pain to myself. I don't cut or leave marks so nobody would know, but I'm capable of inflicting the feeling of "heart break" almost on command. Most for the time I just fall down the steps so it just looks like I'm tripping. I'm not 100% sure why I do this, but I often do it as a form of punishment for myself.
Wow jubeh you are a pretty fucked up guy.
- I think of myself as a hero way too often.
- I can be pretty snobby about loads of stuff even petty shit. If I try I can stop myself doing it but it just kinda comes naturally.
- Any time there is a single girl in my group I will flirt with them to make other guys near me jealous and elevate myself.
- If people try to put me down or talk down to me I will cut them down or get angry at them but I put other people down constantly.
- I have a kinda fucked up, sadistic sense of humour. Someone told a story about how they broke their leg (it was their own fault), everyone else was sympathetic, I laughed. When I get drunk this gets worse - I slammed some dude up against a wall and shouted in his face for 'hitting on my girlfriend', just to see him get scared and laugh at him.
Last edited by Delphinus; 08-27-2012 at 06:27 PM.
Originally Posted by Fenn
I dont want anyone at work to succeed unless it's directly because of me. If they do I become instantly jealous that they recieved praise and can't help but think "I could have done it better or faster.". If some one even seems like they are on the fast track to a promotion or seem like they are closer to an important person I start to think of all the shit they have fucked up on or said that I can slam them with. Like working off the clock or shit like that.
I know I should be more realistic about my abilities but I can't help it. I know I am the shit but I won't act like it outwardly.
I am humble honestly and thankful but on some level I feel like I deserve to have these fuckers kissing my feet.
I attach myself emotionally to people who show me the slightest kindness. It's to the point just before stalking IMO. I will text them every day almost and I begin to hate myself if they don't respond right away. Eventually I pull away because I know I'm being a pest and if they told me to back off it'd kill me.
No more than anybody else but it felt good to write all that outWow jubeh you are a pretty fucked up guy.
- I often seem like this really upbeat guy and happy-go-lucky, but it's simply a mask for my at times extreme depression, loneliness, and suicidal thoughts. I bottle almost everything I can, even happiness, as I know it is only temporary, I hate being disappointed, so I try to make sure there's nothing I can get disappointed by, by stowing it away.
- I'm really nice, to the point where I'm often used. Fuck.
- I get inspired by other's lack of skill compared to my own, especially in a classroom setting. It pushes me to do even better. Though I'll just as easily spill all my tricks and tips and help out if asked.
- I'm a loner, I've drilled that in my head, though I can't stand being alone; I lie to myself that I don't need anyone, thus good relationships are few and far between.
- I can't function when I'm happy, I need my misery and depression to stay productive. If I'm happy, my inspiration disappears, but if I'm drowning in sorrow, I can churn out masterpieces like nothing. This was made even more apparent when I won my school's art show and $500 with a piece that was explicitly displaying my depression and all dat angst.
- I know I'm slowly killing myself, and honestly, I just don't care sometimes. This leads to, ehhh.. wreckless behavior. Though I traded in inflicting self-harm for just beating myself to death on hot concrete while skating. I get my fix.
- I used to watch Barney religiously. I mean come on, a muthafuckin' purple dinosaur, all that's missing is a hat and cane!