That was pretty upsetting. I felt pretty drawn into the story at some points, as though I were running alongside her. Some sentances though I think could be structured abit more appealingly
il try to use the quote thing to show you..
mm kay so like i was saying. Sentances like this one perhaps feel abit slugish. Maybe the use of even for the second time makes it that way.Even if she was stronger than anyone else she knew she would not even win in a fair fight with these thugs.
I thought it was a great story though and i liked / was sad about the ending. Thought it was sad that the thugs never found her yet she died anyway .
Is anyone else going to go ? its been more then two days.