New storyplot idea, and first character design

[Shuro]

I agree with Fenn, fully.

It might seem hard, but just use your imagination. Honestly, if I would make him seem stupid at the beginning, while working for the nobles, but during his time as a servant(or whatever), have him research and what not, studying every aspect. I assume this kingdom is high tech(I didn't really read it all). And if so, maybe this 'Angel' could possibly be one of his defective cyborg(still cliche, but eh), who kind of drifted away. Perhaps you might believe she has a 'mother' but in actuality, it is illusion in itself, that the scientist put in her 'mind'.

And if you are thinking it, I wouldn't do the whole, 'Guy falls in love with Angel'. It is kind of cliche, as stated before. It is nice, but it is like a piece of gum you love. You like it for that short while, but then you grow tired of it.

Anyways good luck.

If you want, you can look at my thread or others, to get ideas of story plotting.

[Phoenix]

Hello again.
I have come up with a new idea.. It's still based a little on the Dreams storyplot I made.. but it's a little different.
Dropped the angel thing.. couldn't get that to work..

It has no title yet, so if you have an idea, please let me know.

Fun thing, I had just gone to bed, when I thought of this. Then because I wanted to remember it, I had to get up and write it down so I didn't forgot it. :P

But here it is. Please tell me what you think^^

It plays in some sort of midieval time, but they have technology.. so..
Or maybe is could be steampunk.. Really like that style.. Tell me what you think ^^

SPOILER! :

Storyplot

The main character (a boy) sits after school, watching out the window, when suddenly he sees a bright light from the sky. Right after that, a thing crashes through the window, and get stuck in his table.
When he comes to himself, after the great shock, he finds out that it was a crystal that crashed through the window. And because he is very curious, he reaches out to grab it. But right as he touches it, he disappears in a bright, white light.
He now find himself to be in a forest, and he starts to look around. Something in the bushes scares him, and he starts to run. He runs into this girl, who is on the run from the evil guys henchmen. She then grabs hold on the main character, and they manage to shake them off and hide.
She tells him, that it is she that has sent the crystal to find someone to help her on her mission to give the crystal to the father*. She cannot face that journey alone. She doesn’t have the powers to it alone.
She is a witch, and she is the only survivor from when her village was destroyed by the evil guys. Before her grandfather, the eldest wizard in the village**, died, he gave her the crystal and told her to bring it to the father.
The story then builds up around this quest, and at the end, there will be an epic battle between the witches and the evil guys. Our hero is the only one who can defeat the leader of the evil guys.
The evil guy want the crystal, because it contains great powers that he would use for bad things.


*The father is the highest wizard of them all. He contains all powers of all witches and wizards in the world. And if he were to die, all the witches and wizards would lose their powers.

**The eldest witch or wizard(depends on which sex they are) in the village, has a piece of the father in form of a crystal. It contains all the powers from all witches and wizards in that village. Without the crystal, they wouldn’t have any powers. As long as the crystal is with the eldest, all have their powers.

[Bacon_Barbarian]

Much better. Though, why is he the only one who can do it?

[Phoenix]

Much better. Though, why is he the only one who can do it?

There are some things I need to work I know that. But this was only the first outcast of the idea I got.
I hope I am able to make this to a good manga story, and I hope I am able to finish it too :P
All the other times I have startet on a manga, I haven't finished it, but I will this time.

I have now startet on making the character designs.
Here's the male character's design.

[ClockHand]

oh look, a Cloud.

[Phoenix]

oh look, a Cloud.

Yea, he does look a little like Cloud. But I first saw it when I added the sword... And that's why I think I'll give him another weapon.

[SuperKasey]

Is this your main character? I'm assuming he came from our world into a fantasy world right? If so you may want to figure out how he dressed on this side of the veil since you'll probably be drawing him that way quite a bit at first. Also, where did the sword/other weapon come from? Why does he need it? Who teaches him to use it? Why did the Crystal choose him? What does he have to offer?

Not attacking you, just things to consider.

[Phoenix]

Yea you assumed right. In our world he is dressed in a standard japanese school uniform. White shirt, black jeans and black shoes or whatever. I know, I'll have to make a drawing of him wearing that. And I will.
For all of the questions about the sword: Don't really know about the sword yet. I just added it to the picture to make it look cool. Maybe he will have it, maybe not. Maybe some other weapon? I don't know really..
But yea, those are things I need to consider. Or just some of them.. It's a hard process coming up with a good story to tell.. :/

[GAbRieLWrIgHt]

Haha, they have the same name as my OC.