Tag's Light-Novel "Hanako" ( W.I.P)

[tag654]

Well Before I start,I want to say a few things,one this is copyrighted so far....so It cant be stolen,so please don't try

And lastly,I'm open to comments,questions,help(),and or critiques on the overall story or advice for it to get better....BTW- This is long so just bear with it XD

This is the original copy from when Me and my writer came up with..so you'll find comments from some people in our group.first part is a timeline and then the other part which is the FULL Storyline:Enjoy.

Actually found out it errors out when I paste the storyline,so go to this
link:http://www.scribd.com/doc/73156503/Hanako-Storyline

-Tag


use this one,if ur getting trouble with the other:

http://www.mediafire.com/?ba4lmawyjz4wnfp


*update* on recent comment

For some reason,I seem to get an error when I try to post the whole thing,so thats why I have these links here.

[Maxx_Wellington]

ok Tag, I get that you are proud of your story, however here, we don't steal art or stories. We all know the pride our accomplisment gives us and this is a safe haven for you to post your stuff for friendly advice on it, free of theives.

now on to the story. I got confused trying to read your story through your site. Could you please post just the story on here? I am very excited to read it!

[tag654]

I cant man,whenever I try it
it gives me an error,story/plotline is like 20 pages long dude...

unless theres away to post that much on here without getting the error?

[Maxx_Wellington]

Try posting it section by section in here. if it is too long, then only post what you can in one reply.

[tag654]

[Section One]
-Hanoko's Father works under project Hex
-Develops the Time Amulet and the Flower Clip
-Turns on Hex and is "killed"
-Hanoko's mother "sells" her to Hex as an experiment
-Hanoko, along with the other test subjects, are given their powers
-Hanoko escapes from the lab, ends up in a coma for ten years
-Taken into foster care by the sleeper
-Hanoko meets Aimi, they become friends
-Hex corp goes public, releases their new super-human serum
-Roi shows up
-Incident with Aimi's abduction
-Hanoko confronts the sleeper
-Runs away to find Aimi
-Roi confronts her, has his turning point where he decides to help her, revelation of his past
-Together they infiltrate the small Hex base where Aimi is being held, kill some minor henchman-scientist, rescue Aimi, gather information, destroy the base
-The three of them set out to find the remaining two experiments
-Find Hitoshi
-Confronted by the Hex group, showdown at the plaza
-Saved by the mystery man, aka Hanoko's time-traveling father
-Flee the city
-Set up camp in the abandoned villa in the forest
[End of Section One]

[Section Two]
-Hanoko, Aimi, Hitoshi, Takoa, and Roi form the resistance*
-They go about fighting Hex, building the resistance, and developing character relationships
-Hex finds out about the gem in Hanoko's flower clip
-Hanoko discovers the secret of her flower clip, that she can release her full power by taking it off
-Hex uses Hanoko's possession of the flower clip to place an international bounty on her head
-The fight against Hex starts to get more difficult, since there are now all sorts of rouge groups after her
-Hanoko starts becoming noticeably corrupt
-The scientists develop the blueprint for the super-weapon
-Hanoko goes into cryogenics
-The scientists use Hanoko's flower clip to power the new weapon
-They use the weapon to win a crucial victory over Hex
-Celebration without Hanoko
[End of Section Two]

[Section Three]
-The leaders of the resistance are forced to pick a new leader, while still pretending that Hanoko is leading
-They continue fighting Hex… things go well
-Hex discovers that Hanoko is gone
-Uproar among the global community
-"Sightings" of Hanoko begin to occur
-The resistance starts to crumble
-Hex plans their "final" attack
-Scientists make a breakthrough, create an alternative restraint for Hanoko
-They revive Hanoko, she gives her epic speech
-New recruits flood the resistance just in time to defend against Hex
-Hex attacks at the resistance base
-The resistance fends them off with the help of Hanoko and their new members
-Some tragedy occurs, death, fight between characters

[Section Four]
(This is the least complete section… really something we should all work on together)
-Hanoko and the resistance prepare for their final battle with Hex
-Hex unveils its perfected version of the super-human serum, releases it to the general public
-Rumor spreads that Hex has used the new serum to create the "perfect human"
-(skipping a bunch of stuff that could happen here)
-The final battle


Ok, so that's the timeline. As you can tell there's room between each of these events for, well, anything really. This is simply a very, very rough outline of the major events that I created. There's a lot more happening behind the scenes of this, and it doesn't necessarily portray each of the events as we would portray them in the story. It is what it is: a timeline.

[tag654]

[Section One]
Time Frame: From the time Hanoko is born to her Initiation into fighting Hex. About 18 years.
Estimated Episodes: anywhere from 10 to 50, depending on the length
Status: Pretty much complete

Hanoko's Father works for Hex corp, a former government program gone rouge after the government cut funding to their division. Now without the government over their shoulders, the members of Hex begin conducting highly illegal experiments in hopes of finding a way to create a more powerful human being. Hanoko's father, however, does not agree with their quest for power, and decides that they must be put to an end. Hex is getting out of control, though, as they continue to grow as a company through illegal black market investors who want a share in the new wonder product. And the crumbling government has bigger issues to deal with than a group of scientists breaking some rules. So Hanoko's father and mother devise a plan to attack Hex from the inside out by having them create the weapon which will ultimately be their downfall: Hanoko. How they do so and all that stuff is explained in the backstory section.

Basically, Hanoko's mother sells her to Hex as part of the plan. After she sells her Hanoko's mother gives her a flower clip, and says "This very Important. You keep this at
all times". They sell Hanoko (who is 6) to the scientists. (the scientists have 3 other test subjects)

Alaisa's Note: I don't think that they should "sell" her but didn't have enough money to support the family and told her that she had to go away until they were finacially stable. Because to the audience it would seem like they don't want her and all of a sudden they want her back.


2 male:
Takoa - Age eight. Humble and gracious, but also has a strong sense of justice. Makes a very good leader. Tall, and likes his mouse-brown hair kept wild and crazy.

Hitoshi - Age five. He is feisty, strong-willed and headstrong. Sometimes impatient, it is in his nature to get things done as quickly as possible, as soon as possible. Loves to run.

1 female:
Aimi- Age six. Very fun - Attractive and loves to dance.

Alaisa's Note: Don't forget to add that she loves to swim as well.

[tag654]

They Inject all subjects with the serum. Hanoko is the only one with the fever, though. She is the only one with the fever because the flower clip that she wears is fighting the serum, trying to cancel it out. Not severe, but painful. She starts to sweat in bed and she wakes up in a bad jitter, like after a bad nightmare. She has no idea what’s going on, blurry vision. She's disoriented and has little control over herself. She opens a sliding window because she's hot from her fever, but in doing so she triggers an alarm. She’s scared and has no idea what to do. At this point her hearing is really sensitive, so it really hurts her ears. She sees the shadows of men running down the hallway and freaks out. She's scared out of her mind and decides to bolt, climbs out the window and runs into the forest. The scientists catch a glimpse of her running away and pursue her. The noise of the alarm and the scientist yelling/running after her is aggravating her. She’s very disoriented, it is hard to see. She stops at the edge of cliff-like formation with a bridge between two cliffs, and about a fifty foot drop below. The doctors also stop, hoping that she won't try to cross the worn-out bridge. They approach her all calm like. Hanoko is backing up on the bridge, like a scared animal, and due to a strong shock that runs throughout her body, collapses into a position where her feet are on either side of her and basically plopped hard on the bridge(shock), and then the bridge collapses. As she's falling though, her clip comes out and makes her fall less fatal then It really would have been.

After she fell the scientists located her and were about to bring her back to the facility, but then a wandering stranger (mystery man– father)* found her. The scientists cannot intervene, because they cannot allow the public to know of their existence, much less their experiments. So all they can do is watch as the stranger takes her to a hospital. And they can’t very well just steal her from the hospital either, so they're kinda stuck. They keep watch over her while she is in the hospital, and it is their top priority to make sure
that no one finds out what they have done to her, since it is highly illegal at this point in the story.

Alaisa's Note: What happends to the clip? We need to add that in so that the audience isn't left wondering what happend.

(10 years later, age:16)
Hanoko is wandering in a black void of empty space, she looks around and sees a blurry white hole in the middle of her view, growing as she walks closer. She walks toward it, putting her right hand over her face like the suns in her eyes and keeps walking out of curiosity. When she is trough she finds herself in a hospital. She had been in a coma for the past ten years. She wakes up from her coma panting. She doesn't know were she is, so she decides to go explore. (she woke up right as the nurses were leaving so the nurses aren't there). Hanoko grabs her i.v (a little weakly) and wanders the corridors (and has small flash-backs of her parents and running through the forest) she then clenches at her head and falls. Then the the doctor escorts her back to the room telling her to not be so impatient.


(Ten Years ago, Right after Hanoko escaped)
After hearing word that Hanoko broke out of the facility, the three other subjects have plotted their own escape, because they all are terrified of what might happen to them next in this strange laboratory. They use a bit less blunt of a method, however, and manage to escape without being detected. After obtaining their freedom, the three band together for a while, working together to pilfer food in a nearby city (basically street orphans). But then an agency similar to social services finds them, separates them, and puts them into adoptive families. HEX Corp. has been searching for them all the while, but thus far has not been able to locate any of them.

(3 Years After The incident,age:11 - in coma still)
After the first batch of experiments all managed to escape, HEX Corp. created a new version of the serum. The alterations, besides enhanced performance and lack of previous bugs, also included a new element which erases all traces of memory and suppresses emotions. This new strand of the serum is used on a new group of experimentees, this time a willing group of volunteers. This new group are named “sleepers” for their lack of memory and emotion. They send one such sleeper (Dr. Robec) to the hospital to keep an eye on Hanoko. His power is x-ray vision, so he makes an especially good surgeon and is a natural fit a the hospital.


(Present)(Age 16)
After Hanoko awakes from her coma and has recovered, Hex Corp has Dr. Robec adopt her as a way for him to continue watching over her. However, the social services-esque agency also checks up on her constantly to make sure that she is being treated well, so HEX corp is still unable to bring her back to the facility and retire her as they would wish to do (since they now have a new and improved model). So since they can't do that they decide that the next best thing is for Mr. Robec the sleeper to watch over her indefinitely. Hex corp also figures that Hanoko is not at risk of exposing their past experimentation, since she has forgotten all about it while in her coma. Hex Corp. also takes this corse of action because of the Bosswoman's affection for Hanoko, and the fact that she wants her to have as pleasant and normal a life as possible.

[tag654]

(SCENE SHIFT - High School - Midyear, senior year)
It is Mid-Senior year of school for Hanoko -she lives with the Mr. Robec, the sleeper. However, Hanoko's mother, who is one of the higher-up leaders of Hex by this point, wants to further observe Hanoko, as any mother would. She personally issues a sleeper to follow Hanoko as a friend from school. She has tampered with the formula injected into this particular sleeper so that he does have somewhat of a sense of emotion, but not enough that it is detected by the scientists, so they don't catch on. She gives this sleeper orders to report directly to her with any and all information concerning Hanoko. His name is Roi Tetsuhada.

Roi Tetsuhada
Age: 17
Half black, half japanese, he has the ability to speed things up and slow them down. He wields a sword and a gun, which he will eventually learn to synch with his power by slowing down bullets and redirecting them with his sword.

[tag654]

it errors out otherwise

[tag654]

what ill do though,is once ur done reading ill change all of this to the next pages,and do it that way...the main thing im trying to do with this story is give it arcs...and make it very unique from most animes/mangas...but still capture the audience and be a long running manga series.