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Tag's Light-Novel "Hanako" ( W.I.P)
Well Before I start,I want to say a few things,one this is copyrighted so far....so It cant be stolen,so please don't try
And lastly,I'm open to comments,questions,help(),and or critiques on the overall story or advice for it to get better....BTW- This is long so just bear with it XD
This is the original copy from when Me and my writer came up with..so you'll find comments from some people in our group.first part is a timeline and then the other part which is the FULL Storyline:Enjoy.
Actually found out it errors out when I paste the storyline,so go to this
use this one,if ur getting trouble with the other:
*update* on recent comment
For some reason,I seem to get an error when I try to post the whole thing,so thats why I have these links here.
Last edited by tag654; 01-09-2013 at 11:13 PM.
ok Tag, I get that you are proud of your story, however here, we don't steal art or stories. We all know the pride our accomplisment gives us and this is a safe haven for you to post your stuff for friendly advice on it, free of theives.
now on to the story. I got confused trying to read your story through your site. Could you please post just the story on here? I am very excited to read it!
I cant man,whenever I try it
it gives me an error,story/plotline is like 20 pages long dude...
unless theres away to post that much on here without getting the error?
Try posting it section by section in here. if it is too long, then only post what you can in one reply.
Here is the timeline...
-Hanoko's Father works under project Hex
-Develops the Time Amulet and the Flower Clip
-Turns on Hex and is "killed"
-Hanoko's mother "sells" her to Hex as an experiment
-Hanoko, along with the other test subjects, are given their powers
-Hanoko escapes from the lab, ends up in a coma for ten years
-Taken into foster care by the sleeper
-Hanoko meets Aimi, they become friends
-Hex corp goes public, releases their new super-human serum
-Roi shows up
-Incident with Aimi's abduction
-Hanoko confronts the sleeper
-Runs away to find Aimi
-Roi confronts her, has his turning point where he decides to help her, revelation of his past
-Together they infiltrate the small Hex base where Aimi is being held, kill some minor henchman-scientist, rescue Aimi, gather information, destroy the base
-The three of them set out to find the remaining two experiments
-Confronted by the Hex group, showdown at the plaza
-Saved by the mystery man, aka Hanoko's time-traveling father
-Flee the city
-Set up camp in the abandoned villa in the forest
[End of Section One]
-Hanoko, Aimi, Hitoshi, Takoa, and Roi form the resistance*
-They go about fighting Hex, building the resistance, and developing character relationships
-Hex finds out about the gem in Hanoko's flower clip
-Hanoko discovers the secret of her flower clip, that she can release her full power by taking it off
-Hex uses Hanoko's possession of the flower clip to place an international bounty on her head
-The fight against Hex starts to get more difficult, since there are now all sorts of rouge groups after her
-Hanoko starts becoming noticeably corrupt
-The scientists develop the blueprint for the super-weapon
-Hanoko goes into cryogenics
-The scientists use Hanoko's flower clip to power the new weapon
-They use the weapon to win a crucial victory over Hex
-Celebration without Hanoko
[End of Section Two]
-The leaders of the resistance are forced to pick a new leader, while still pretending that Hanoko is leading
-They continue fighting Hex… things go well
-Hex discovers that Hanoko is gone
-Uproar among the global community
-"Sightings" of Hanoko begin to occur
-The resistance starts to crumble
-Hex plans their "final" attack
-Scientists make a breakthrough, create an alternative restraint for Hanoko
-They revive Hanoko, she gives her epic speech
-New recruits flood the resistance just in time to defend against Hex
-Hex attacks at the resistance base
-The resistance fends them off with the help of Hanoko and their new members
-Some tragedy occurs, death, fight between characters
(This is the least complete section… really something we should all work on together)
-Hanoko and the resistance prepare for their final battle with Hex
-Hex unveils its perfected version of the super-human serum, releases it to the general public
-Rumor spreads that Hex has used the new serum to create the "perfect human"
-(skipping a bunch of stuff that could happen here)
-The final battle
Ok, so that's the timeline. As you can tell there's room between each of these events for, well, anything really. This is simply a very, very rough outline of the major events that I created. There's a lot more happening behind the scenes of this, and it doesn't necessarily portray each of the events as we would portray them in the story. It is what it is: a timeline.
the actual story is much longer,ill post what I can:
Status: Semi-complete, always open for changes and additions
Estimated episodes: None, it's just stuff that we reveal throughout the story
Time frame: Spans the entire story
Set in the year 2137*. The economy has struggled severely worldwide, causing the entire planet to fall into a global depression. Much of the world is overpopulated, leaving may of it's citizens starving, sometimes even dying of hunger. Most major cities (including the one Hanoko lives in) have become emense concrete jungles, with people living anywhere they can find and doing whatever they need to do to survive. Skyscrapers tower over every block, trying to accommodate the overwhelming population. We'll go more in-depth about the actual backdrop for the part of the story when it comes time to start drawing.
Many governments are weakening, even collapsing, due to their inability to control and provide for their populations because of the crumbling economy. The world is on the verge of anarchy, with many parts of it already succumbing to chaos.
Hex Corp started out as a government program researching in the fields of human advancement. Their job was to find common problems in people's everyday lives and then create ways to fix them. However, the government shut it down due to a lack of funding after the economy took a turn for the worse. But the scientist working on the team (including Hanoko's father) were on the verge of a breakthrough in a new project which would make man immune to all natural diseases. They couldn't let all their research go to waste, so they continued their work in secret, using their own money as funding. But since the government was no longer watching over their shoulder they decided to take the project one step further and give the subjects supernatural powers. Hanoko's father was the team expert on all things supernatural. They created the serum, and were ready to test it on a subject, but Hanoko's father thought it was morally wrong, and at the last minuet threatened to report their activities (which were highly illegal at the time) to the government. The rest of the team, it their thirst for power and fame, killed him and destroyed all traces that he was ever a part of them.They continued on with their experimentations and tested the serum on human test subjects, who eventually become our four main heros.
As previously mentioned, he was the Hex corp expert on all things supernatural. The plans that Hex had made for the superhuman serum required an immense amount of power to create, and so they had him research ways to power their experiment. In his research he found evidence which lead him to believe that there might be some truth behind an old myth about an ancient gem said to hold unlimited power. He searched for years, blah blah blah, and eventually found it (much more epic than described). However, upon finding it he decided that it was too risky for any one person to be able to possess unlimited power, so he split the gem into three fragments. He returned from his journey and presented Hex with only one of the fragments, secretly saving the other two for himself. He went on to use one of the fragments to create Hanoko's flower clip and the other to create his time-travel amulet. He then utilizes the time travel amulet to execute an elaborate scheme in which he betrays Hex Corp, fakes his own death, and then travels throughout time helping Hanoko behind the scenes. He makes several appearances in the story line as a "mystery man", and towards the end of the story his true identity is revealed.
Hanoko's mother was in cahoots with with her husband, Hanoko's father, in his plan to fake his own death in order to escape Hex Corp. Their plan all along was for him to fake his own death, for her to "sell" Hanoko to Hex, and then for her to eventually join Hex as a business executive so she could keep Hanoko safe, while her Father looks after her through his time-traveling role.
So far I think we've decided that one of the main themes should be a deviation of the classic "no one can do it alone" thing and tweak it to "no one should do it alone". We demonstrate this through showing how the unlimited power Hanoko has access to ultimately corrupts her, to the point where she must keep her clip on almost all the time. Also, I get the sense we're going for a "value in individuality theme". The main villain is against individuality and wants a utopian society of sorts. Maybe even stretch it to "the value of humanity"? Like how the serum almost deprives you of humanity. We still have a lot of room for work on this portion of the story.
The Flower Clip-
As mentioned before, Hanoko's flower clip was crafted by her father to protect her from herself and others looking to exploit her powers. It drastically lowers her ability to use the powers given to her by the serum. At first Hanoko has no idea of its influence, but she eventually realizes that she gains access to her full power when she takes it off. No one else knows about it either, until Hex corp makes the discovery that the gem they have been using to power the creation of the serum is only a fragment of its full self. Then they somehow figure out that Hanoko has a piece of it in her clip, and they release this information to the world. This makes the clip the target of countless theft attempts, putting Hanoko in further danger. This makes the flower clip both a liability and an asset for her.
Time Frame: From the time Hanoko is born to her Initiation into fighting Hex. About 18 years.
Estimated Episodes: anywhere from 10 to 50, depending on the length
Status: Pretty much complete
Hanoko's Father works for Hex corp, a former government program gone rouge after the government cut funding to their division. Now without the government over their shoulders, the members of Hex begin conducting highly illegal experiments in hopes of finding a way to create a more powerful human being. Hanoko's father, however, does not agree with their quest for power, and decides that they must be put to an end. Hex is getting out of control, though, as they continue to grow as a company through illegal black market investors who want a share in the new wonder product. And the crumbling government has bigger issues to deal with than a group of scientists breaking some rules. So Hanoko's father and mother devise a plan to attack Hex from the inside out by having them create the weapon which will ultimately be their downfall: Hanoko. How they do so and all that stuff is explained in the backstory section.
Basically, Hanoko's mother sells her to Hex as part of the plan. After she sells her Hanoko's mother gives her a flower clip, and says "This very Important. You keep this at
all times". They sell Hanoko (who is 6) to the scientists. (the scientists have 3 other test subjects)
Alaisa's Note: I don't think that they should "sell" her but didn't have enough money to support the family and told her that she had to go away until they were finacially stable. Because to the audience it would seem like they don't want her and all of a sudden they want her back.
Takoa - Age eight. Humble and gracious, but also has a strong sense of justice. Makes a very good leader. Tall, and likes his mouse-brown hair kept wild and crazy.
Hitoshi - Age five. He is feisty, strong-willed and headstrong. Sometimes impatient, it is in his nature to get things done as quickly as possible, as soon as possible. Loves to run.
Aimi- Age six. Very fun - Attractive and loves to dance.
Alaisa's Note: Don't forget to add that she loves to swim as well.
They Inject all subjects with the serum. Hanoko is the only one with the fever, though. She is the only one with the fever because the ﬂower clip that she wears is fighting the serum, trying to cancel it out. Not severe, but painful. She starts to sweat in bed and she wakes up in a bad jitter, like after a bad nightmare. She has no idea what’s going on, blurry vision. She's disoriented and has little control over herself. She opens a sliding window because she's hot from her fever, but in doing so she triggers an alarm. She’s scared and has no idea what to do. At this point her hearing is really sensitive, so it really hurts her ears. She sees the shadows of men running down the hallway and freaks out. She's scared out of her mind and decides to bolt, climbs out the window and runs into the forest. The scientists catch a glimpse of her running away and pursue her. The noise of the alarm and the scientist yelling/running after her is aggravating her. She’s very disoriented, it is hard to see. She stops at the edge of cliff-like formation with a bridge between two cliffs, and about a fifty foot drop below. The doctors also stop, hoping that she won't try to cross the worn-out bridge. They approach her all calm like. Hanoko is backing up on the bridge, like a scared animal, and due to a strong shock that runs throughout her body, collapses into a position where her feet are on either side of her and basically plopped hard on the bridge(shock), and then the bridge collapses. As she's falling though, her clip comes out and makes her fall less fatal then It really would have been.
After she fell the scientists located her and were about to bring her back to the facility, but then a wandering stranger (mystery man– father)* found her. The scientists cannot intervene, because they cannot allow the public to know of their existence, much less their experiments. So all they can do is watch as the stranger takes her to a hospital. And they can’t very well just steal her from the hospital either, so they're kinda stuck. They keep watch over her while she is in the hospital, and it is their top priority to make sure
that no one finds out what they have done to her, since it is highly illegal at this point in the story.
Alaisa's Note: What happends to the clip? We need to add that in so that the audience isn't left wondering what happend.
(10 years later, age:16)
Hanoko is wandering in a black void of empty space, she looks around and sees a blurry white hole in the middle of her view, growing as she walks closer. She walks toward it, putting her right hand over her face like the suns in her eyes and keeps walking out of curiosity. When she is trough she finds herself in a hospital. She had been in a coma for the past ten years. She wakes up from her coma panting. She doesn't know were she is, so she decides to go explore. (she woke up right as the nurses were leaving so the nurses aren't there). Hanoko grabs her i.v (a little weakly) and wanders the corridors (and has small ﬂash-backs of her parents and running through the forest) she then clenches at her head and falls. Then the the doctor escorts her back to the room telling her to not be so impatient.
(Ten Years ago, Right after Hanoko escaped)
After hearing word that Hanoko broke out of the facility, the three other subjects have plotted their own escape, because they all are terriﬁed of what might happen to them next in this strange laboratory. They use a bit less blunt of a method, however, and manage to escape without being detected. After obtaining their freedom, the three band together for a while, working together to pilfer food in a nearby city (basically street orphans). But then an agency similar to social services finds them, separates them, and puts them into adoptive families. HEX Corp. has been searching for them all the while, but thus far has not been able to locate any of them.
(3 Years After The incident,age:11 - in coma still)
After the first batch of experiments all managed to escape, HEX Corp. created a new version of the serum. The alterations, besides enhanced performance and lack of previous bugs, also included a new element which erases all traces of memory and suppresses emotions. This new strand of the serum is used on a new group of experimentees, this time a willing group of volunteers. This new group are named “sleepers” for their lack of memory and emotion. They send one such sleeper (Dr. Robec) to the hospital to keep an eye on Hanoko. His power is x-ray vision, so he makes an especially good surgeon and is a natural fit a the hospital.
After Hanoko awakes from her coma and has recovered, Hex Corp has Dr. Robec adopt her as a way for him to continue watching over her. However, the social services-esque agency also checks up on her constantly to make sure that she is being treated well, so HEX corp is still unable to bring her back to the facility and retire her as they would wish to do (since they now have a new and improved model). So since they can't do that they decide that the next best thing is for Mr. Robec the sleeper to watch over her indeﬁnitely. Hex corp also ﬁgures that Hanoko is not at risk of exposing their past experimentation, since she has forgotten all about it while in her coma. Hex Corp. also takes this corse of action because of the Bosswoman's affection for Hanoko, and the fact that she wants her to have as pleasant and normal a life as possible.
(SCENE SHIFT - High School - Midyear, senior year)
It is Mid-Senior year of school for Hanoko -she lives with the Mr. Robec, the sleeper. However, Hanoko's mother, who is one of the higher-up leaders of Hex by this point, wants to further observe Hanoko, as any mother would. She personally issues a sleeper to follow Hanoko as a friend from school. She has tampered with the formula injected into this particular sleeper so that he does have somewhat of a sense of emotion, but not enough that it is detected by the scientists, so they don't catch on. She gives this sleeper orders to report directly to her with any and all information concerning Hanoko. His name is Roi Tetsuhada.
Half black, half japanese, he has the ability to speed things up and slow them down. He wields a sword and a gun, which he will eventually learn to synch with his power by slowing down bullets and redirecting them with his sword.
I think that's all i can post?