Being a Pirate is Really Badass (Ugarit)

[Sylux]

"Jang! Excellent job single-handedly defeating that terrible monster aboard the Sahuagin ship! It seemed the creature was attached to a horrendous statue, which you so courageously threw overboard to lure the monster away from us! You were so strong, and so brave! Honestly, I was quite jealous, and I sincerely wish that someday my abilities can match those you have, even just now!" Lacia slyly translated for Annah, tossing her a wink.

[Regantor]

Super excited about being praised, Jang's tail blindly thrashed and writhed at a hundred knots a second, vibrating all the stools close by and nearly knocking over at least one of Annah's (former) freinds. There was a massive smile on her face, and her arms were balled up in gusto-y fistycuffs, too. "You see Jang am greetness even if nobody want because they not as good as Jang an they know! You see he proove, hear!"

After that, she just kept gyrating up and down. It was a pretty effective method of spreading her smelly musk, that.

"Jang know stone guy are bad for see and rummember ah did. Even if never move they mean bad. You not know 'cause you don't walk under wet and Jang is one who does and is greet at it, hear?" She continued to gabber at a thousand knots per second, now trying to make Lacia drink from her mug in 'thanks' instead. "Have tough aswell and am totally as look good. Eef you leek Jang can tell how you be too, listun? Jang only ask that trade watch food and also pull out three-bit spear next time happen also 'cause that hurt Jang even through so tough. For that Jang will be always guard and nice."

A fevourish giggle later, she was back to clinging onto Annah and insistantly trying to touch the woman's face.

[Kodos]

Annah coughed and gave an awkward smile. "Jang, lovely, when was the lost time you had a bath?" She asked meekly.

[Regantor]

"Baff?..." Jang parroted the word. It was not so much like the mermaid was confused about what it was, and rather more like she was confused about why she was being asked. "Last time man offer baff he tell Jang take clofves off! Jang know nasty trick, hear?"

It took an extra few seconds of marinating in that fishy head for a cunnin' plannz to form.

"Annah you wanna give I baff, it cost you guard Jang when she asleeps and take out pointy hurts when ask." She made a squeaky (alluring?) tone, arcing outwards with her chest and arms in an incredibly awkward attempt to appear erotic. One had to wonder if she even quite knew what was involved. "This offer for Annah only, since she liek Jank only, and can be friend, hear?..."

Suddenly, the browny-red mono-eye shot towards the water sorcerer. "Offer not for Lacia, he too nice and up to something and prolly has pants worm even through look like girly."

[Sylux]

"Oh, Jang! It's a shame, because I'd have loved to guard you," Lacia cunningly slithered out. He began chuckling to himself at Annah's total comfort.

[Kodos]

"Oh, yes, I definitely think Lacia has a pants worm." Annah laughed. "But I don't know how to fight, Jang, at least not very well, and the only medicine I know is just some ways to fix hangovers that don't work very well, and some other stuff. I can't fix... uh... pointy hurts." She shrugged and gave an awkward smile.

"But once you have a bath, I bet all the guys on the ship will be all over you." She gave a wink. "I'll probably have to keep the cap'n on a leash even."

Somehow she managed to almost keep a straight face.

[Regantor]

"Mee-da-sin?" Jang narrowed her eye, rubbing the lengthy scar on the bridge of her nose in confusion. Wasn't just pulling the pointy thing out all you had to do? "Jang don't need mee-da-sin befure and she don't need now. Great 'cause heal on own, hear? Just stab is super hurt like ten hundred more worse than normal hurt and nobody can pull out..." For the last part, she lent in close and cupped her hands, as if to reveal some vast astounding secret. "...Even Jang cannot 'cause hurt too much, hear? It hurt like propa propa bad... most worstful thing evar..."

Getting stabbed hurts. Go figure. Quick, somebody write this down!

"If guys on ship wanna fight Jang, through, not sure if want do..." She mistook quite what Annah was trying to say, looking up into the air now, but still holding onto her dress.

Suddenly, a stray hand lashed out and grabbed Lacia by the collar, dragging him back into the range of that terrible breath. The pint she was supposed to still be holding with that hand clattered to the floor, spilling beer all over his shoes. "Why mens want fight Jang, if have baff? You say she stink, and then want to 'get all over' if not stink, why? You already want fight with Jang, but cannot 'cause Jang has great air flavour huemins don't like?..."

Her grip was pretty strong despite those stringy limbs, and she didn't seem prepared to let go of either of them until she found out why exactly the 'guys' wanted to 'be all over her'.

Regardless, the way she pouted out her cheeks like a pufferfish wasn't so much intimidating as it was incredibly childish. Did she actually understand being angry, either?

Did the bug-eyed lanky fish wench understand anything?

[Harvester_Of_Sorrow]

A half bottle of whisky and a dirty glass accompanied Groh as he sat staring at the merlady and that fine piece of cunt engaging in an encounter that could at best be called embarrassing to the senses. He drifted in and out of what they were saying as he sat alone at the table, paying closer attention to the musicians behind him playing stringed instruments that he had not heard for many years, playing melodies he had not thought possible. He enjoyed the music. He imagined he was flying. Flying across a land of volcanic ash and scorched earth as he heard the tempo change, enchanting the terrain he had cunjured in his minds eye deeper, a terrain that seemed to allow him to lose himself in his own alcohol-sodden head, if only for a few brief minutes.

His expressionless face turned its gaze elsewhere, fixating on nothing inparticular as he allowed the music to wash over him, only breaking his fantasy periodically to command his right hand to lift the glass to his face.

He didn't care about much. Not right now.

[Kodos]

Annah laughed, opened her mouth a few times to say something, then realized Jang probably wouldn't be able to parse it and settled on something else.

"I mean, um, uh, everyone will think you're really pretty if you have a bath. They won't want to fight you then. They might if you don't, though."

She gave a nervous little smile and demanded another drink from the barkeep - something stronger.

[Regantor]

"...Yo-yo-you tryin' be freind with Jang, and then sayin' Jangs not good? You say she ugly and you no like smell, is that you saying?" Jang's arms writhed angrily. She was definately dumb as a post, there was no doubt about that, but her stubborness was perhaps something she had learned... After all, if somebody was actually bothering to be nice to her, they had to be after something, right?

"Jang no trust! Jang no trust!" He arms suddenly jolted downwards, and her tail made one almighty slap against the floorboards. "Jang know you all like..."

The maroon eye narrowed into a slit. She was remembering something old and spiteful, through the haze of alcohol.

"Fuckin'... Dark skin huemins from the sixy countries... Yeah, Jang know... You think stupid and make trick and kill and steal, but Jang know, hear..." The tone of her voice suddenly changed to a slippery growl, one with an honest anger she had never chosen to display before. "You make mers persons work until dead and give'em no choice. Jang see and hear... She know how you dark skin's talk 'bout her... But now you talk nice? I... I-I know you doing, whore-bitch..."