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Thread: A Pirate's Life For Me (Ugarit)

  1. #231
    Fifty Fifty Member Evil_Cake's Avatar
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    Amanda leaned up against a rail. "Do we have any clue what the mayor looks like? Don't want to torture the wrong guy."

  2. #232
    One Thousand Member Regantor's Avatar
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    "Ledz tour-tur everywun!" Fish thing sounded... excited. Really really excited. "We... we.... we gutta show erm.... a.... Afruat... Afreti... Aff-o-ro-tee. Afrotee, hear?"

    "Boat out of good tastey thingz, want nice good things do I. Toor-chur people all now!"

    Completely without warning, she grabbed onto Annah's wrist and pulled her over for a massive licking session. Basically as gross as that sounds.

    "...Badsmart uglies lyan..." It seemed dissapointed, but kept doing it. "Say was test best of boasts in ass and beeb but also taste dry poopie huemin meat, liaorz..."

    "Annah, is Jang an toor-tur she a it? Hungry is. Non freind are for makin' fun, hear..."

    Okay, well she officially doesn't know what torture is either then. Or lewd humour. Mystery solved.
    Last edited by Regantor; 07-01-2013 at 12:58 AM.

  3. #233
    Bad Enough Dude to Rescue the President Kodos's Avatar
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    Annah just watched and tried not to laugh as Jang went on about... whatever it is that Jang was going on about.
    Then the foul smelling thing was all over her arm and licking it and oh gods make it stop. Annah quickly pulled away, luckily her looks, company, and line of work had all conspired together to make her rather good at quickly escaping from the grasp of smelly things that wanted to lick her. "No touching, Jang! No touching, remember? Not unless you have permission. It's rude, remember?"

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  4. #234
    One Thousand Member Regantor's Avatar
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    "Is not rudd, hungry is! Hungry is!" The fishy bluely girly thing protested, loudly, shriekingly, throwing up her arms. "Annah toor-chur for not share tasty meats! Think were freind! Hear?"

    "I go! Toorshur and find gubbinz us want." It's head darted to the captain. She was going to go and torture people and find loot? Well I guess that's basically what being in her company involved anyway.

    Another look at Annah. Angry? It burped. Then writhed off.

    Writhed off, worming along the ground suprisingly quickly, like an furious eel. With boobies.

    ...Well... That was a thing that... happened?

  5. #235
    "The mayor is probably the old dude in the mayors house, I'm sure we'll figure it out. Now all of you go enjoy shore leave."

  6. #236
    One Thousand Member Regantor's Avatar
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    Jang didn't need to be stealthy to shoplift; Her ferocious maw could basically swallow anything smaller than an apple whole. This did not always neccisarly include edible objects.

    One stout piemaker actually did confront her. They were met with a messy-squirmy bout of wrestling, writhing and slapping that wasn't so much effective as so dumbfounding, giving an eelthing ample time to storm off.

    Annah found her several hours later in a bar, a situation which Jang 'improved' by screaming and flopping all over her the minute she walked in the door.

    "ANNAH! YOU SHOULD PROUD! ANNAH!" Noises. "JANG GET ALL OF THE LOOTS AND GREAT TORCHUR! ANNAH! ANNAH YOU LISTUN?"

    At least she didn't smell of fish for once; She smelt of half the town's pies. :3
    Last edited by Regantor; 07-20-2013 at 11:25 PM.

  7. #237
    Bad Enough Dude to Rescue the President Kodos's Avatar
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    RISE FWOM YOUR GWAVE. Necessary changes due to missing players. HoS do you live, btw?

    The heist in Tesoro went without hitch - and before the town guard could be notified as to what had happened the two ships were already on their way towards Caleruega, with what Annah guesstimated to be about 50,000 GP worth of coins and loot.

    Score!

    ***

    In Caleruega the Cap'n was able to unload their stock of luxury goods. Thanks to Annah's sweet-talking the local merchants, they got the best deals possible - another 300,000 GP! Awww yisss!!!

    Naturally, there was a celebration on both ships, which involved lots of drunkenness. Since the horrible fish-lady had been bathing more or less regularly - at least relatively speaking to everyone in the crew that wasn't Annah or Rhodes - Annah even danced with her and let her try on some of her jewelry - inasmuch as something with no legs can dance.
    In fact, Annah was in such a good mood, and feeling so generous, she agreed to make out with any male crew - besides the Hadozee - that also agreed to do the same for Jang.

    Annah looked out for her underwater friends. :3

    ***

    Annah woke the next morning noticing two things, immediately. The first was that she was quite hungover. The second was that she was in Zach's bed, but Zach was not there. She distinctly remembered having fun with him that night. Well, him among others, but he was definitely the last.
    That was odd. He usually woke her first. She didn't think she was *that* hung-over...

    Trudging onto the deck, Annah poked her way around the ship, the vast majority of the crew still asleep because they were lazy pirates and/or because they were lazy pirates who spend most of the night drinking, gambling, fucking, and drunkenly trying and failing to fuck.

    ***

    Why was the... oh.

    ***

    An hour later, Annah dragged - literally in the latter case - Lacia and Jang over into the captain's quarters with her, locking the door behind her. She looked fantastic - she seemed to be wearing more make-up and jewelry than she usually did, and also had opted to wear, as far as clothes went, one of her smaller thongs and nothing else.
    She also looked pretty nervous. And furious. Both, really.

    "Um... uh... there's a situation. Like... a big one." She gave a nervous smile. "Uh... Zach fucked us." Before Lacia or Jang could say anything she quickly cut them off. "No, I'm not talking about my sex life. He's gone. And, uh... so's the loot. I mean, not all of it? But a lot - uh, most? - of the gold..." She tugged at her long black hair nervously. "I figure we should tell the crew but, um... I'm afraid Anna Marie might murder me. And uh... well, have you two done this all before? Last time I was on a ship and this happened, we keelhauled the captain. Zach's not here - but I am. And uh, well, I mean, I am - was -" she sounded very angry and clear on that last point "the captain's girl, you know... uh..." She shrugged.

    "Maybe we should just make a run for it? The crew's so hungover I don't think they'll notice us."

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  8. #238
    Sir-Mass-a-Lot Sylux's Avatar
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    "No, we can't run away," Lacia interjected. "They'll assume the worst and come after us too - and considering our experience and company," he motioned at Jang, "we wouldn't exactly blend in anywhere. We have to call a crew meeting, but we should tell Amanda first. If it doesn't go down smoothly, we're going to need her on our side." Lacia moved closer to Annah and he placed his arm on her shoulder. "It will be alright," he said soothingly.

  9. #239
    Fifty Fifty Member Evil_Cake's Avatar
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    Annah found Amanda on deck of La Maquina, dead asleep, along with a bunch of other members of the crew. After nudging her awake, Annah led the drowsy swashbuckler back to Zach's former quarters. Only once they were inside, did Annah inform Amanda of the traitorous deeds of Captain Zach.

    No one likes to be woken up early, and its even worse if your wake up call is news that (almost) all your gold is gone. "What are we all dicking around here for??!" She grabbed Lacia by the shoulders and started shaking him violently. "We gotta hunt that SON OF A BITCH down and KEELHAUL HIS ASS 'til there's nothing but a bloody stump left!!"

  10. #240
    One Thousand Member Regantor's Avatar
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    "Blend 'uin?" Fish girl sneered at Lacia. She was not just hungover, but still really quite drunk. "You hoomins get all over-drunk and die in plain old waters, and Jang not, hear? I not be found if not want be found. But you lucks I says and protects, hear..."

    Now, a great many things Jang did not understand, but somebody else pinching your stuff was one of the things it most certainly did. The problem was that she had no idea how to deal with it.

    "Maybe Zach is blend in?" She sputtered luridly, melting over Annah's shoulders, rough her teeth were still beared, and her fits balled. Angry hugs were now a thing. "How know blend in, Annah?"

    "Shud tor-chur all peoples! Torchur and one will admit he is Zach who is blend in! Fuckers!"

    "..."

    "...I... sea sick..."

    "..."

    "...Annah, you gotta say who I murdurs! Murdurs! I heads are feel ungood, but angry, and... hear... but murders! Jang is murders, hear?"

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