Yeah, looking at it now, you're right, he's probably a wee bit overpowered...
He now no longer has that high school geography qualification. After all, he's 16, right? How could he have completed high school? That would just be super silly.
Also, he is only hurt by emotional pain. The idea that someone would want to try and hurt him is what makes him heal; He's kinda got low self esteem like that.
Double also, I didn't really think that his title, 'God+1', was that long... Can't even think of a way to shorten it, to be honest. Maybe it should just be changed to something like '?'... But, yeah, then it would kinda be like "Hey look, it's '?'!", and I don't really think that makes any sense...
If you were talking about his 'job', a Starjousting Extradimensionaut Mercenary Nightpirate Robopriest of love and peace, I'm not sure why, since it's a real profession and everything. >_>
I suppose we could use this thread to help eliminate Sues and build up decent characters.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jubeh
Name: Sierra Summer
Height: 5 '
Weight: 94 lbs
Build: Small and fragile, flat and curveless
Key traits: Albino; prosthetic right hand; good at math, art, and culinary, bad at English, history, P.E., computer tech, and government; has terrible eyesight and wears contacts
Personality: Always tries to take the logical approach to problems, rarely succeeds (characters have to grow) because she's immature and inexperienced. Thinks mostly positive. Easily scared, easily intimidated, easily amused. Creative and calm, but too scared to show her art, writing, and music to anyone but her sister. Her writing sucks anyway; her art is only average; her compositions are actually decent, and therefore, uninteresting to talk about.
Title(s): Miss, or Ms.
Description: An average girl with just a few unique traits. She is unable to play most sports due to her hand and makes the excuse that she hates sports anyway. She draws a lot, writes a lot, and composes music because she likes creativity. Her writing sucks, mostly because she can't spell; her art is average; her music is pretty good. She sits around and eats ice cream a lot and is forced to work it off by her older sister, who frequently challenges her to sparring matches, footraces, and other physical activities, usually until she can barely stand afterward. Otherwise, she's just a normal, lazy little girl with unrealistic expectations for her future (wants to be a master of the arts).
Likes: Ice cream, art, books, music, sleeping, hanging around at the beach and doing absolutely nothing, her sister, her friends
Dislikes: Slasher films, gym class, unrealistic expectations (hers are an exception), poorly-written stories, amateur music, DeviantArt (she's an elitist)
Personal Quote: "A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."
Story: Lives with her parents in South Africa until she's ten. Then her aunt's husband gets a terminal disease. She becomes desperate and listens to a witch doctor who says he can heal the dude with an albino person's limbs. After an internal dispute, Sierra's aunt chases her down and cuts her hand off. A man from Sierra's church saves her and shoots her aunt. So Sierra goes to live with her relatives in America, where she is tainted by the ease of living and becomes lazy. Later, her aunt comes to America and personally apologizes. After copious amounts of distrust, shootings, stabbings, crime, kidnapping, near-rape, bomb threats, and running away from all of the aforementioned, everything is nicely sorted out. As a result of all that crap, Sierra grows up and becomes far more mature, like any non-braindead person would as a result of such experiences.
Love the quote. Bill Cosby FTW!
Name: "Daisuke" Ryuu Tatsuya
Age: 216 but looks about 24 in human years
Height: 6' 2" (human) His dragon form is ginormous! Probably about 30 feet or so.
Weight: 177 lbs (human) Probably over a ton in his dragon form.
Skills: He is a shape shifter, who can revert between his true dragon form, a half-dragon form (human body with wings), and his full human form (basically no wings). He can fly in both his half-dragon form and his full dragon form. He can, of course, breathe blue fire in all of his forms. Dragons heal very quickly and are impervious to all kinds of spells; unless caste by a dragon sage (a dragon who has skills in sorcery). (Yes in my story there are dragon sorcerers and sorceresses.)
Traits: In his dragon form, he looks like a large blue dragon with horns, short spiky hair, and large blue wings. In his half-dragon form he looks like a human with large, blue dragon wings. His human form has think spiky blue hair, and deep blue eyes that have an innocent, yet intense look to them. He has a birthmark on his upper right arm that looks like a dragon tattoo. His alternate personality, Ryuu, takes the half-dragon form. His eyes turn a menacing red, his fingernails are long and sharp, and his teeth become jagged.
(yes my profile pic is a rough sketch of Daisuke)
Home Town: The Draconian Mountains where all of the Dragons live. (They don't like humans or any body else for that matter. What snobs)
Titles: Prince Ryuu Tatsuya. The future Emperor of the Blue Sky Dragons (I'll probably create a better name. This sounds a bit lame.)
Personality: Daisuke: Meek, gentle, kindhearted, not very confident, extremely apologetic, kind of wimpy, but will fight for his friends, gullible
Ryuu: Hot headed, violent, merciless, vicious, and devious
Description/History: Ryuu Tatsuya is the only child of the Emperor of the Blue Sky Dragons. That means he'll be the emperor once his father passes away. The dragons are a proud race and dislike all other life forms. They are strong, proud, and of course temperamental. Ryuu was different from the other dragons. He was meek, kind, and loving. The emperor was very displeased with his son's gentle personality and ordered his personal sage to curse Ryuu with an alternate personality; one that was the exact opposite of the gentle prince. Now whenever Ryuu is angry or in trouble, his alternate personality appears and beats the living crap out of whomever ticked him off. When Ryuu discovered that his father was ill and would pass away, he panicked and fled the mountains. He flew into the land of the very territorial Onmoraki (demon birds) and they attacked him. He crashed into a mountain and fell to the bottom of a canyon. He was discovered by Celestia (name may change) a beautiful sage with long white hair and two different colored eyes (one blue, one green). Apparently Ryuu had lost his memory from the crash. Celestia gave Ryuu the name Daisuke which roughly translates into "great help or helper" because he was so kind and helpful. When Daisuke is mad his alter ego still appears and goes by the name Ryuu (Daisuke's true name).
Likes: Daisuke: Sweets, cute and furry animals, Celestia (lol), flying, cooking
Ryuu: Beating the living crap out of anyone in his way, burning stuff, fighting, flying, laughing manically
Dislikes: Daisuke: His alternate personality, being a leader, closed spaces, swimming, people who are evil, the knight who Celestia is engaged to (uh-oh).
Ryuu: Daisuke, cute and furry creatures, the knight who Celestia is engaged to, me, you and even the person sitting next to you as well. (watch out!)
Fav phrase: Daisuke: "I'm sorry." Or at least that is what he says a lot. His fav phrase to hear is "Dinner time!"
Ryuu: "I feed off your cries of agony!"
Yes, both Daisuke and Ryuu are names that have been overused, but I did research on names and their meanings and these two fit my O.C's personality the best. He may not be the main character of my series, but he is by far my favorite. :3
I've got alot, but this is by far my favorite. he's still in prosses though.
Full Name: Kendan Lee Storm
Birthdate: September 28th
Eye Color: Dark Green
Hair Color: Dirty Blonde
Personality: He's of average intelagence and a calm person. That is, when he's not on his ADHD medicine. He does well to hide it, but he often gets very fidgety when nothing is going on. He's very overprotective of his friends and family and often looks at the worst case senario to things. Because of this, he is very cautious in what he does. He gets reckless only when he hasn't taken his mediciation (which does happen on occasion).
Useless Facts: When he's nervouse, he says "Uh" at the beginning of a sentence and ends with "Hm". When his emotions run high, his eyes seem to glow. He has five siblings, an older brother, a twin sister, and three triplet younger siblings. (I didn't do it on purpose, but if you notice it goes 1, 2, 3)
Build: Tall, lanky underweight and awkward.
Skills: He's good at very little and what he is good at is hardly note worthy. Can read and warp other people's minds as well as detect ghosts and spirits as well as cloak himself from other psychics.
Key traits: Clumsy, unathletic (unless you count running for his life), unkempt, alcoholic, psychic.
Home Town: San Fransisco
Current Residence: Las Vegas
Occupation: Bartender, ex Drug Dealer
Sorry how many oc are allowed here?
This is the main character of a story I've just started working on, and also my first post on this forum! :D (except for the welcome wagon)
So, let's get this party started!
Age: (progressing with the story) at the start he is around 11 years old (he doesn't know his birth date, but he is estimated at that age)
Height: (progressing as well, of course) 5'
Weight: 100 lbs
Build: Nimble, Not too tall (even when he grows up)
Hair Color: White
Eye Color: Black (i know what some of you are thinking, black and white aren't colors xD)
Skills: Climbing upon rooftops, hiding, stealing, later he learns to use a sword.
Lives on the streets
Have I mentioned that he is an orphan?
Personality: Typically a good guy (but a thief nonetheless). Athletic, likes to play, childish, creative, resourceful.
Any other special things that should be told?
He seems to be the only child living in town, and lives on his own; so he doesn't have any friends to play with or all that.
Until he finds a dragon's egg, out of which a dragon hatches that becomes his friend.