View Full Version : Bottled Prince *Beware of mature pic! O.o*

04-12-2011, 11:15 AM
Hi everyone. I just wanted to post up some one of my manga's that I am currently working on. I'm not a professional at all and still have a lot to learn and hope to get better but here are the chapter covers and links to my manga Bottled Prince. Please forgive me if it doesn't look very good at all but I will do my very best to keep learning and studying so I can get better and better, so any helpful pointers or comments would be greatly appreciative.
I'll just post up the chapter covers for each one. You can click on the image and it will take you to where all the chapters are at for you to read. I hope I posted this in the correct thread.

Chapter One:*after going back and looking over this chapter I'm starting to see a LOT of embarrassing mistakes O.o*
http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/ree_risa/frontcover.jpg (http://www.mangamagazine.net/manga/20)

Chapter Two: *Same thing goes for this chapter as well. I'm thinking about going back and redrawing these two chapters but it is fun to see how much I've grown so I'm not to sure...*
http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/ree_risa/00.jpg (http://www.mangamagazine.net/manga/20)

Chapter Three:*This cover was so embarrassing for me but she is making her debut in this chapter so there you go.....so embarrassing!!! I might change it....* It's been re-edited finally

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/ree_risa/00-1.jpg (http://www.mangamagazine.net/manga/20)

Chapter Four:
http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/ree_risa/00-2.jpg (http://www.mangamagazine.net/manga/20)

Chapter Five:
http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/ree_risa/00-3.jpg (http://www.mangamagazine.net/manga/20)

04-14-2011, 02:14 AM
Excellent! Very enjoyable to read. You're a very good artist/writer and the composition is superb as well.

The only thing I noticed is that at times your lines seem a bit thin/wobbly - easy enough to fix, but a pain in the ass I suppose :P

Great work, keep it up =)

04-15-2011, 10:20 PM
Usually this isn't my type of thing. But this is awesome indeed.

04-16-2011, 08:18 AM
There's a lot of energy in each panel and the page layouts flows with that.
I really like how you express the Chasity's emotions through her body and movements, and not just her face and chibi stuff (though those are expressive too).

I was about to comment on the uneven perspective at some places, but, seeing the fifth chapter (fourth?), you seem to have leveled up in that considerably.

The Prince dude seems compassionate, but is also seems extremely closed and stoic - a stark contrast to Chasity's open expressiveness. It's hard to care and feel for the guy, outside of obligation and awe at his extremely cool feats. But, by exploring how their contrasting personalities interact a bit more, you could further development of their connection to each other and your readers - with those two, you have a lot of potential for both character growth and even some humor if you wish to pursue that again.

04-16-2011, 09:01 PM
Oh hey! You made an account here? Cool. I totally plugged you (indirectly) and MangaMagazine here.

04-18-2011, 05:00 AM
Please forgive me for my late response. I thought I subscribed to my thread so that I knew when someone responded but I guess I was wrong =.=

I will definitely keep practicing so that I get better at my line steadiness. My hand will shake a lot when I draw so I'll make sure to pay more attention to the finished product so it won't look so odd :D Thank you for your helpful comment! I want to make sure to look out for any errors or mistakes that I miss over so I can fix them :D

@GunZe- Lol! I'm glad to see that. I had actually wanted the story to go a totally different way but each of my characters personalities started to take over and I ended up down this road oddly enough O.o What type of story does it come off to you as? *it's a strange question but I'm interested to see what you first though of it :D*

@Wind- Thank you for saying that Wind! I agree with you 100% about your view on the prince's personality. Since you don't know much about him right now I'm glad to see that he is coming off the way I wanted him to but you are right, he really is the opposite of Chasity. She is friendly and can be sometimes emotionally controlled while the prince is anti-social, and has a hard time expressing his emotions so he comes off emotionless and very blunt . It's hard for me to go very long with out doing some kind of humor but I hope that I do well enough with their character development in the future because I want them to learn from each other. Thank you for letting me know all of that though! I'm happy to see that I'm starting to get better at my perspective. I struggle a lot with trying to figure out which point to use and how to do it, so I hope to keep improving in the future. That really helped.

@Bacon_Barbarian- That was so kind of you Bacon!! I'm happy to see that my story is interesting more people! Thank you!!

04-18-2011, 08:27 PM
I know this sounds wierd but.
I've never seen so many black people in a manga before.

04-19-2011, 08:45 AM
@Slurpee- Lol don't worry about sounding weird. That's what I'm use to as well. I grew up reading a lot of comics that had very few black people and any other diversity as well, so I felt that I should be free to do the same as well. If they can focus on one group of people then I should be allowed to as well. I'm sure there are people that don't like that but everyone is entitled to there own opinion and I'm sure it looks strange to others but it's all awesomesauce to me. Lol either way thank you for your comment :D it made me smile and snicker at the same time *My sense of humor is a little off to certain people hahahaha*