PDA

View Full Version : Parenting



Psy
04-28-2012, 02:01 AM
Parenting and parents.
What are yours like?
Where do you think they went right or wrong with raising you?
What will you do differently with your own children? That is assuming your parents haven't put you off on the idea of having your own children.
What do you think every parent needs to know to be a good parent?
What do you think every parent does wrong with their kids?

jubeh
04-28-2012, 02:04 AM
I got like 50 kids

Hayashida
04-28-2012, 02:08 AM
I got like 50 kids
And I happen to know they're all ill-behaved

Psy
04-28-2012, 02:08 AM
That's a lot of goats.

There is allways this intimidation factor to parenting that everyone seems to think you need. You could get way better results with teaching them to respect you by respecting your child but that rarely happens.

Sylux
04-28-2012, 03:58 PM
The only way to parent is to make your child read books all the time and work in the rain. That's what mine do, and just look how I turned out.

Bacon_Barbarian
04-28-2012, 04:49 PM
My dad is really old, and it's cool, funny, and sort of scary all at the same time. It' cool because he has such interesting stories to tell. He remembers the Kennedy assassination and was drafted to go to Vietnam (and thankfully never did). It's funny because he'll go on these ridiculous rants on how everything sucks now and that if today's products were sold back in his youth, they'd never have made it because of the shitty quality. It's annoying because he isn't exactly in the best health (the reason he never did go to Vietnam is that he's had horrible Kidney stones throughout his life, and these have only gotten worse as he's aged) and I'm afraid he's going to die before I get much older (relatively speaking).

AlmanacnamedTime
04-28-2012, 05:53 PM
Mine are the most laid back people I know. Plus my dad is really good at teaching anything(my mom not so much, but she knows other stuff.
They've taught me a good work ethic, although sometimes I need reasons to do things.
I'm a bit more of a physical person then my parents so I'll probably show my kids what I mean.
I think parents need to remember how they felt when they were children, because most adults penalize children for doing things that they did but not explain why not too.
Every parent will definitely not teach them something right at first because every child sees things and learns things in a different way.

WhenRabbitsAttack
04-28-2012, 07:00 PM
grr i hate my internet.

okay this is what i typed out just before:
my parents are alright and have taught me good values, but the place a huge amount of pressure on me and my older brother to get good grades. passing is not good enough for them, we have to earn at least an A or higher.
when we don't live up to these expectations, they become dissapoiunted when we might not have scored the grade for as simple a reason as not having enough time.
for when i become a parent :
one thing i really hate the almost everyone seems to do, not just parents, is to yell at you, apologize for yelling, and then proceed to tell you off for whatever you wher doing that made them yell at you. it's hypocritical and insincere, and makes it sound like they did nothing wrong when they shouldn't yell in the first place. you always apologize last if you want them to believe you are actually sorry.
tough love is somethingelse i don't believe in, as it instigates behaviour of not telling anyone when something is wrong, which could be potentially life threatning.
last: always keep your promisies. always. my dad has trouble with this one.

Sylux
04-28-2012, 07:35 PM
How the fuck do you earn higher than an A. Seriously I made a final numerical score of 106% in Geology last year and still only got an A.

Bacon_Barbarian
04-28-2012, 10:04 PM
A+ is technically higher than an A.

But honestly uncompromising grade requirements are horseshit. Some people just aren't book smart. If my kids weren't good at math, but excelled in English, I'd be fine with them getting a C+ in Algebra.

Inksprout
04-28-2012, 10:09 PM
Some places do A+ or like AA+ or something. This might sound weird but now that I'm older i feel like my parents didn't push me enough to pursue goals. I always got good marks at school, and my sister always got not so good marks and my parents never really minded. We had piano lessons but we were never made to practice more, and never made to study grades in it. I was very sporty when I was younger but my mum never took me to join a sports team or anything. I liked drawing but never had the oppurtunity for drawing lessons and etc etc. So I guess I think parents should be aware of their child's interests and enccourage them, even if it comes off as being 'pressure'. I disagree with too much pressure towards accademic achievement unless the child is actually interested in it, as I was. I look at my child hood and feel like it was a bit of a waste because now I really wish that I had learnt piano more since I can't afford lessons now, but at the time I didn't even know about the graded music system or how fast I was supposed to learn it.

ClockHand
04-28-2012, 10:39 PM
Asians fault.

jubeh
04-28-2012, 11:57 PM
I have an asian mother but instead of being incredibly strict about academics and musical talent she was just really insane about cleanliness. She didn't give a shit about music or school -- just that the house was clean. I used to fuck the whole place up just to spite her and ironically now as an adult have to remind myself that I'm over it and just clean my room.

corastaur
04-29-2012, 01:00 AM
My parents are really good about getting behind whatever it is we're interested in, but they also force us to do things if we don't want to do it and they think it's for our own good. Pretty much every time I've been forced to do something it ended up being great so no complaints there. (piano, viola... basketball at one point. I sucked.) Their rule is always pretty much you have to give your absolute best in everything you do, and so long as you do that they don't care about the results - they always say they'll love us no matter how much we mess up. Meaning if my brother gets a C it's fine so long as he actually studied and put in effort. I think it's a great way of doing things and my grandparents on my dad's side are the same way. If I ever have kids (i'm NOT planning on it) I would do the same thing.

Inksprout
04-29-2012, 01:32 AM
Your parents sound pretty cool

corastaur
04-29-2012, 02:02 AM
Iiii love them :P haha I dunno they're pretty chill for the most part, and they really love doing things with us like camping or sports or just having fun as a family. I feel like I had a pretty good childhood because of that...

WhenRabbitsAttack
04-29-2012, 02:11 AM
well, im still suffering through mine (;3) but i love my parents.
answering previous questions: we are grade as not acheived (F) achieved (C-B) merit (A) and excellence (A+) my parents are dissapointed if i don't score merit or higher cause i'm one of the sad people who hate academic things, but aren't bad at it T-T

corastaur
04-29-2012, 03:11 AM
silly parents... just do your best :)

Sylux
04-29-2012, 11:19 AM
My mom wants at least C's but fuck that. I've already developed my plans to go to community college, and everyone knows that any old chump can get into one of those, even with just a GED (which is what I plan to get at military school). Um generally she's constantly disappointed in everything that I do and think that my activities are all wastes of time. Um she also doesn't seem to understand how serious my band is really getting. Idk what's with her buy whatever, I graduate next year, if not I get my GED at the end of November, so I'm cool.

Matt
04-29-2012, 12:09 PM
My parents raised me probably the best way I could have been raised. My brother and sister are different stories.

I think parents should be aware that not all children are the same--that they need to accept and acknowledge the traits that came with the kid at birth and try to tailor those that are gained through experience to make the kid effective in life.

pajamajam
04-29-2012, 10:23 PM
My parents never gave a crap unless my siblings and I were being noisy or getting into trouble. My mom occasionally got up and taught me things, like cooking and sewing and needlework, but for the most part they were either at work or tired from work and not in the mood to put up with us. If I wanted to get out and do something, it had to be free or really cheap and I had to find my own way to get there. I never thought it was a big deal to walk as far as I did, but other people were astounded by it.

My dad used to have an amazing temper and would express his anger with his fists (mostly on my brothers), but a bunch of stuff happened and he was forced to sit down and have a good long look at himself. He went to anger management (and was the first person ever in the class that wasn't there by court order) and made us kids tell him with complete honesty exactly why he was such a fucked up guy. It took a while, and it was a hell of a journey for him, but he's a hell of a lot better for it. Now that I'm not scared of him, I think he's a really amazing guy. I don't think I can express how proud I am to have him as my dad.

I'm pretty sure I never want to have kids of my own. Everyone says my feelings will change whenever I finally get pregnant, but I really don't care to find out.

Celestial-Fox
04-30-2012, 01:30 AM
I'm pretty sure I never want to have kids of my own. Everyone says my feelings will change whenever I finally get pregnant, but I really don't care to find out.
Don't let people push you into think you'll want them, and don't be afraid to call them out on their insistence if its rude. I think people that don't want kids are perfectly okay, and that other people should chill out when they find out that some just don't want kids.


My parents. Eh. My mom says some pretty darn rude things to me, and my dad — I just don't "get" the guy. They try their hardest, and they love me, though. So minimal complaints.

Cloudy
04-30-2012, 07:15 AM
A lot of parents baby their children too much and make them spoilt, like a kid falls down and is clearly fine kids are meant to take a few tumbles here and there...then the parent makes a fuss and the child cries. thus giving the child a reason to cry = negative attention.

I hope when I have kids I don't turn into this kind of parent.

ClockHand
05-01-2012, 01:52 PM
Who need kids any way?

Hamachi
05-01-2012, 03:31 PM
http://i.imgur.com/LkwBy.jpg

JJJorgie
05-01-2012, 09:58 PM
My parents get mad at me if I have less than 4.0 GPA. They support me in sports and art, but they don't really understand me which leads to a LOT of arguements. Luckily, my dad's gone almost all day because he's in the military, but my mom stays home on the farm, which just leads to more fights. I don't think I have a lot of room to complain though because I can tell they love me and I guess it could be worse.

ClockHand
05-01-2012, 09:59 PM
send them stuff through farmville.

Mr_Liebe
05-02-2012, 02:25 AM
My parents were great, if anyone should have complaints, it's them, they got stuck with me.

Evil_Cake
05-02-2012, 02:47 AM
wat but they made u its their fault u exist

err fault isnt the right word but o well

ClockHand
05-02-2012, 02:51 AM
My parents were great, if anyone should have complaints, it's them, they got stuck with me.

Yeah man, I have heard a lot of complains from your parents.

Psy
05-08-2012, 05:19 PM
I was at work and I realized that my parents never taught me how to be an adult.
There are basic things people should know about that should be taught to them before they need them in the real world. I never knew about credit cards (other than "stay away from credit cards") or how or where to pay a bill hell driving for sure and like how to file taxes and starting a bank account to save money for when you need it plus more. So now that I'm older and hitting that age that some people agree is the time when a person is mentally an adult I'm realizing that I don't know shit and my parents held out on me.

Anyone else feel like their parents haven't shared enough of what it's like to be an adult?

jubeh
05-08-2012, 05:19 PM
ya

AlmanacnamedTime
05-08-2012, 05:30 PM
nope, i can cook gourmet food, balance a budget do taxes mow a lawn replace/clean any flooring, wire the house, put in sheetrock etc.

This was all voluntary by the way

Psy
05-08-2012, 05:42 PM
I can take care of a household no problem but I feel like there was no talk or discussion on the ways of the world. No one expressed how exspensive things were and what having an hourly job felt like even that none of its set in stone when having a job.

Hayashida
05-08-2012, 11:36 PM
ya a lot of these things im learning on my own

ClockHand
05-09-2012, 03:12 AM
To be fair, my parents never taught my anything, so I can't really point the fact that they didn't taught me all those stuffs of life.

Evil_Cake
05-09-2012, 03:17 AM
they didnt teach u how 2 use a toilet??

ClockHand
05-09-2012, 03:21 AM
Don't know. I can't remember those stuffs.

WhenRabbitsAttack
05-09-2012, 03:22 AM
they didn't teach u to make 2 minute noodles!?

ClockHand
05-09-2012, 03:28 AM
lol, I taught them.

Celestial-Fox
05-09-2012, 06:39 AM
I was at work and I realized that my parents never taught me how to be an adult.
There are basic things people should know about that should be taught to them before they need them in the real world. I never knew about credit cards (other than "stay away from credit cards") or how or where to pay a bill hell driving for sure and like how to file taxes and starting a bank account to save money for when you need it plus more. So now that I'm older and hitting that age that some people agree is the time when a person is mentally an adult I'm realizing that I don't know shit and my parents held out on me.

Anyone else feel like their parents haven't shared enough of what it's like to be an adult?
I think my parents haven't really taught me as much as they should have about that kind of stuff, because they want to shelter me so much (threatening that they'll make me live in their house again, etc). I'm genuinely clueless. But I can also say that my parents probably aren't the best people to teach me about that kind of stuff, seeing how they operate. D: