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GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-14-2011, 08:04 PM
This isn't completely for me, it's for a lot of people who write plot's that are too cliche. Cliche isn't always bad, only if it's too much like a certain anime/manga. I can give a few tips, like originality, and creativity, but those don't really count because MOST people know that. You can't just take a plot, like One Piece, and alter it a little bit, then call it your own. You can make one about pirates, and some amazing treasure, but honestly, people will know if it's like One Piece, cuz Eiichiro Oda is so weird. I need help to. My plot right now, which is in basic planning, is too much like Fairy Tale, as far as I'm concerned. But a lot of other people probably need help to. I'm also going to post my plot on this.
:monkey_study:

Shota-Roe
10-14-2011, 08:49 PM
A quick thing to note is that no plot one writes will ever be completely original. there's so much out there nowadays that you'll be copying someone in some way whether you like it or not. strive to go against genre norms, but at the same time, do not change the entire genre.

Halo
10-14-2011, 09:00 PM
...Well, originality is hard to come by.
But not all things cliche are bad immediately.

You just need to take the cliche and put your own spin on it. It helps if you're a good writer.
A lot of things that make you groan when you're reading a cliche title are obvious plot twists and utterly stupid dialog, so avoiding those even with a fairly meh overall concept (a group avenging the death of so-and-so while saving the world) makes for an okay read.

While it's good to be completely original, you actually can take a cliche story and fix it to be readable, at least, if not actually quite good... But try to come up with it without going "One Peice is cool, I can make it like that..." Because you'll end up with heaps of similarities.

Also, I've noticed you compare yourself and creations to other mainstream artists a lot. That's a problem. If you can see it, that's bad, but never point it out yourself. Change it when you notice or beta run through people who've read it to see if they notice/point it out.

We can't help you with that because we don't know in what ways its similar... But I was under the impression it wouldn't be too hard to accidentally make something similar to Fairy Tale.

As far as I'm concerned, just avoid " X splits into Y pieces, and Z needs to battle evil for control of these pieces" plots completely and you'll have some sort of chance. . u./// They're way too used up now.

Shota-Roe
10-14-2011, 09:21 PM
oh right thought this would come in handy

plots that are completely overused in mango and animu
>harems
>shojo romance shit
>rescue the princess
>fight demons/ogres/mooks/stormtroopers with a weapon, and then fight other users of that weapon
>catch/find/destroy 'em all
>I WAS A TEST SUBJECT
>sports manga with unreasonable abilities that defy physics (prince of tennis is a hilarious example of this)
>saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaave the wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo rld
>your party consists of enemies you fought and defeated

there's probably more but i don't know what else to put for now. might add more if i think of some later.

ClockHand
10-14-2011, 09:30 PM
Every story has been done already, originality doesn't exist.

What people do is making re-interpretation of the stories.

Halo
10-14-2011, 09:46 PM
There's still a difference between Cliche and Done Before, though. :C

Regantor
10-14-2011, 11:14 PM
Every story has been done already, originality doesn't exist.

What people do is making re-interpretation of the stories.

Sorry, but, not true, my chum!

Seriously, I really don't like it when people say this.

There are loads of stories about pirates, but none about, say, pirates obsessed with ship customization that couldn't care less about loot.

There are loads of stories about giant robots, but none about the poor little buggers in tanks that have to fight them.

The trick is finding new angles, being careful about making it easy for new readers to understand, and then slowly pushing the boarders in new directions. Every once and a while, you might strike out at exactly the right moment, and a whole new genre will be invented.

Bacon_Barbarian
10-15-2011, 02:58 AM
Yeah. It's like how The Magical Girl Genre got invented. Thank Astro Boy.

ram
10-15-2011, 06:33 AM
One advice, Just make sure it's completely different from the most famous ones, Cause it's already obvious in one glimpse.

Like Fairy tale, Naruto, Bleach and Onepiece.

I mean you could build a world about magicians, to counter it the same as fairy tale, Make it that the magicians aren't known by people through out the world, like Bleach that their identity is hidden through out the world.

You can do it in Naruto, Onepiece as well.

Or you can make a world just like bleach but the whole world already knows about shinigami, you can make twists that shinigami's helps crime in that world and make the peace,with the forces of the government as such.

By altering the complete world policy people might not look it as the same.

In story making we don't think about Characters only or Progress only, were the creator of their whole world and never forget that.

kine
10-15-2011, 09:30 AM
im not sure if this helps but try to draw your inspiration from a lot of different things. the inspiration for my manga comes from the Maximum Ride book series, Bleach, FMA and FMA: Brotherhood, Code Geass, Death Note, im not sure if these last ones count but Mark Crilley, and theronaproject. a lot of the stuff from my story comes from the Maximum Ride books but yet again draw your inspiration from multiple places

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-15-2011, 11:34 AM
One advice, Just make sure it's completely different from the most famous ones, Cause it's already obvious in one glimpse.


By altering the complete world policy people might not look it as the same.

In story making we don't think about Characters only or Progress only, were the creator of their whole world and never forget that.

that's what i was saying about cliche, and that's probably what Halo was saying about done before, it's obvious immediatly

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-15-2011, 11:35 AM
This isn't completely for me, it's for a lot of people who write plot's that are to cliche. I can give a few tips, like originality, and creativity, but those don't really count because MOST people know that. You can't just take a plot, like One Piece, and alter it a little bit, then call it your own. You can make one about pirates, and some amazing treasure, but honestly, people will know if it's like One Piece, cuz Eiichiro Oda is so weird. I need help to. My plot right now, which is in basic planning, is too much like Fairy Tale, as far as I'm concerned. But a lot of other people probably need help to.
:monkey_study:
i did say that i was in basic planning, by the time i'm done, it will be nothing like Fairy Tale

ClockHand
10-15-2011, 03:21 PM
Sorry, but, not true, my chum!

Seriously, I really don't like it when people say this.

There are loads of stories about pirates, but none about, say, pirates obsessed with ship customization that couldn't care less about loot.

There are loads of stories about giant robots, but none about the poor little buggers in tanks that have to fight them.

The trick is finding new angles, being careful about making it easy for new readers to understand, and then slowly pushing the boarders in new directions. Every once and a while, you might strike out at exactly the right moment, and a whole new genre will be invented.

What the fuck are you talking about?

The story is not "pirates who customize their ships", the story goes around the goal the characters have. With this sayed a story could be: find love, defeat evil, and so on. What you are suggesting are elements for the story, but in its root the story is the same, over and over again. And as I said we just made re-interpretations of the story.

You could say "hey why not make a harem story where the protagonist repeat the same day over and over again and he has to date different girls for each day" but is still not a story, and in its root it will have already done, because at the end the character need a goal and its goal will determinate the root of the story (finding love, defeat a curse, etc).

Bacon_Barbarian
10-15-2011, 05:26 PM
Clock, you're wrong. That isn't a different interpretation. A different interpretation would be taking Romeo & Juliet and setting in in Harlem or taking Hamlet and doing it with lions. By your logic, any story with a pirate is the same. Exactly the same. This is so incredibly wrong I'm not sure how you can anywhere remotely close to that conclusion.

The characters, setting, and genre make the story, not the root(s). You're right about "a harem story where the protagonist repeat the same day over and over again and he has to date different girls for each day" not being a story, but it's very damn close.

ClockHand
10-16-2011, 12:40 AM
Ok, apparently I haven't been clear about this. Pirates are not a story plot, is just the context on the story. A plot is related to a goal or a achievement that the character or character pursuit. Some authors claim there are 20 basic plots (quest, adventure, pursuit, rescue, escape, revenge, riddle, rivalry, underdog, temptation, metamorphosis, transformation, maturation, love, forbidden love, sacrifice, discovery, wretched excess, ascension, and decision) and in a story you can find more than one plot, this according in how is structured (according other authors there is also a limited combination of structures).

I will take the example of pirates who focus on upgrading their equipment, what they do (upgrade equipment) is not a plot, but it can be a plot if the goal is to upgrade equipment for a objective (or a upgrade as a objective). The idea could work for a video game, but not for a story, because in the story the characters must have goals that affect and contribute the structure of the story.

And when I say roots, its because, as pointed before, there is a limited amount of subjects a story can take, and even more, some other people claim that every story in the world has the same root and point to the same universal true. We can't create anything new, we take things that are already done and we change them, we make re-interpretations of what we know.

Bacon_Barbarian
10-16-2011, 02:53 AM
OK, so what you're getting at is the premise. That makes sense. Personally, I still disagree, putting a new angle on something isn't really a re-interpretation, it just is ... If you know what I mean.

Regantor
10-16-2011, 05:58 PM
I still disagree. Sorry, but over generalizing, and saying every story with similar themes is just a re-hash, is silly.

This 'pirate ship customization' setting you could say is similar in themes to say, any plot involving giant robots, racing cars, or hell, even football teams... But it's not like somebody just sits down and says "Right, I'm going to make a racing car plot like Initial D, only with pirate ships!" Only rubbish marketing types and executive meddlers think like that, because they are trying to appeal to a certain audience by abusing the fanbases of per-existing series.

Coincidental similarities in plots due to humans naturally liking similar themes doesn't just automatically make that plot point an unoriginal re-hash. To say that both the good, the bad and the ugly and cowboy bebop possess zero original ideas between them is ridiculous. Making something original is about the connections you make, the overall picture you build, not the individual pieces or generalized concepts.

Matt
10-16-2011, 08:00 PM
I'll just leave this here:


Overcoming the Monster

Hero learns of a great evil threatening the land, and sets out to destroy it.

Rags to Riches

Surrounded by dark forces who suppress and ridicule him, the Hero slowly blossoms into a mature figure who ultimately gets riches, a kingdom, and the perfect mate.

The Quest

Hero learns of a great MacGuffin that he desperately wants to find, and sets out to find it, often with companions.

Voyage and Return

Hero heads off into a magic land with crazy rules, ultimately triumphs over the madness and returns home far more mature than when he set out.

Comedy

Hero and Heroine are destined to get together, but a dark force is preventing them from doing so; the story conspires to make the dark force repent, and suddenly the Hero and Heroine are free to get together. This is part of a cascade of effects that shows everyone for who they really are, and allows two or more other relationships to correctly form.

Tragedy

The flip side of the Overcoming the Monster plot. Our protagonist character is the Villain, but we get to watch him slowly spiral down into darkness before he's finally defeated, freeing the land from his evil influence.

Rebirth

As with the Tragedy plot, but our protagonist manages to realize his error before it's too late, and does a Heel Face Turn to avoid inevitable defeat.

The full thing (read it; it's useful): http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheSevenBasicPlots

ram
10-16-2011, 09:13 PM
@ Gabrieldude, Just make a story that you enjoy making so much, Don't worry too much about similarity and so forth as long as you know you didn't exactly copy any story yourself, It's one of the main moral lessons of those mangaka life based stories(I've been reading too much of those manga lately lol, and now my main goal is why I want to be one is because I want a cute assistant from what I read in mangaka asistant san (http://www.mangafox.com/manga/mangaka_san_to_assistant_san_to/)), Don't think too much about appealing someone with it, People with a story that suck so much has their manga ranking so high if you notice and not only that there are tons of similar stories out there but still famous.

Fenn
10-16-2011, 09:31 PM
Ok, apparently I haven't been clear about this. Pirates are not a story plot, is just the context on the story. A plot is related to a goal or a achievement that the character or character pursuit. Some authors claim there are 20 basic plots (quest, adventure, pursuit, rescue, escape, revenge, riddle, rivalry, underdog, temptation, metamorphosis, transformation, maturation, love, forbidden love, sacrifice, discovery, wretched excess, ascension, and decision) and in a story you can find more than one plot, this according in how is structured (according other authors there is also a limited combination of structures).

I will take the example of pirates who focus on upgrading their equipment, what they do (upgrade equipment) is not a plot, but it can be a plot if the goal is to upgrade equipment for a objective (or a upgrade as a objective). The idea could work for a video game, but not for a story, because in the story the characters must have goals that affect and contribute the structure of the story.

And when I say roots, its because, as pointed before, there is a limited amount of subjects a story can take, and even more, some other people claim that every story in the world has the same root and point to the same universal true. We can't create anything new, we take things that are already done and we change them, we make re-interpretations of what we know.

If you strip every human being down to our basic physical structure, we'd all look pretty much the same, just a different shape and size. It's our nuances that make us unique. The same with stories. The detail and the specifics are what adds originality; not the most basic foundation.

TC, if you're looking to make a story creative, you need to ask yourself not "what" but "how?" When we read a standard fantasy novel or a Disney movie, we usually know the good guy will win over evil. So why do we watch? To see how he/she accomplishes this! It's like the saying goes: "It's not about the destination, it's about the journey to get there."

Saith
10-16-2011, 11:02 PM
Disney's actually a good example, here.
I mean, they take fairy tales and reimagine them in ways suitable for children.
Hell, even though they're cliche as all get out, they're iconic because of how they're made, their themes and... Well, because you grew up watching them.

ClockHand
10-17-2011, 12:56 AM
I still disagree. Sorry, but over generalizing, and saying every story with similar themes is just a re-hash, is silly.

You can disagree all you want, but the fact is that there are universal subjects of stories and those has already been wrote, what we do are re-interpretations. We have Edipo, the struggle between father and son, and we have Luke Skywalker, the struggle between father and son, their motivations are different and how the characters act in the story is also different, but the root is the same, the problem is the same and doesn't matter how many sci-fi shit you put in there, the concept will be still the same, and even the structure of the story is the same (12 steps of the hero YAHY!!!).

Another example: Naruto has to become stronger to defeat his enemy/Goku has to become stronger to defeat his enemy/hero has to become stronger to defeat his enemy = Heracles. Actually is funny, because shonen comics are the most obvious copy paste of the 12 step of the hero in a Heracles-kind.


Coincidental similarities in plots due to humans naturally liking similar themes doesn't just automatically make that plot point an unoriginal re-hash. To say that both the good, the bad and the ugly and cowboy bebop possess zero original ideas between them is ridiculous. Making something original is about the connections you make, the overall picture you build, not the individual pieces or generalized concepts.

The plot will always be unoriginal because we create what we can know. If I don't know something I can't create something that look like it. If I don't know a kind of story, I will not be able to recreate the story. Which mean I will never be original, because every story I made is based on something I experienced (read, life, saw, etc). Also, when you claim that there is originality, then you are also claiming that if someone made a story that look like the other is ripping off the original, because obviously he wasn't enough creative and original to not being able to do a better story.


If you strip every human being down to our basic physical structure, we'd all look pretty much the same, just a different shape and size. It's our nuances that make us unique. The same with stories. The detail and the specifics are what adds originality; not the most basic foundation.

It doesn't matter, when you know the bone structure of the stories you can know if a character will die or not just be his personality and his decisions. You can add what ever you want, but at the end the structure will be the same, which mean I will know how the story is gonna end. I agree, the sweetness of the story doesn't come from the structure per se, it comes from the travel and how everything is done. It doesn't help knowing the 12 hero steps and do them in a story, what matters is the story to be entertaining and complete.

Again, the discussion is about originality, and that, doesn't exist. We (artists, writers, crafter, etc) steal ideas and we made re-interpretations (as you will want to name, giving a twist), but it will only be good if we can make it good.

I think for every story there are a good amount of questions you can do yourself to start writing; "where", will help to know the place, time and context of the story (again the example of pirates). "Who", can help you to know who are the ones carrying the story (hero, antihero, team mates, bad guy). "Problem", what kind of problem does the characters or this world have. "How", who are going the character and/or world interact with this problem. And lastly, "Why", why does the characters/world act as they do.

Also there will be the discussion: Does the character carry the story or is the context? And according of your answer you will choose which one will be more important (still, you shouldn't let at a side the other). And of course you will have to ask yourself: "Who will narrate the story?", obviously you are always going to be the narrator, but, if you chose a character to be the center of the story, you will make more narrow the amount of information that come from the story to the readers (example: in Sherlock Holmes, the story is narrated through Watson, so what you can see, is what Watson see and heard).

Regantor
10-17-2011, 05:41 AM
You can disagree all you want, but the fact is that there are universal subjects of stories and those has already been wrote, what we do are re-interpretations. We have Edipo, the struggle between father and son, and we have Luke Skywalker, the struggle between father and son, their motivations are different and how the characters act in the story is also different, but the root is the same, the problem is the same and doesn't matter how many sci-fi shit you put in there, the concept will be still the same, and even the structure of the story is the same (12 steps of the hero YAHY!!!).
You don't get what I'm saying. You're still over generalizing.

Let's take Blame!; You could say at it's very core that it's a typical quest plot about a guy trying to find a macguffin. But that doesn't just automatically make it a re-hash of Jason's search for the golden fleece. It's not a re-hash of western stories just because the main character uses a pistol. Character development-wise it doesn't resemble anything.

Components are components. You don't call the jet engine an unoriginal invention because it uses a few rivets in it's construction.

Why am I taking this so personally? Because people can and do use this excuse just to use cookie-cutter boring ass plots all the time. I'd even concede that there are shades of original and non-original, but to say that originality doesn't exist at all just because people have made plots which draw on the same experiences as others is just absurd...


Also, when you claim that there is originality, then you are also claiming that if someone made a story that look like the other is ripping off the original, because obviously he wasn't enough creative and original to not being able to do a better story.

If he uses more or less the same components in basically the same combination, yes, it is being unoriginal... But to overgeneralize exactly what components he uses and how (Like saying both stories contain a young hero, and are therefore ripping each another off) is being petty. Differences in the combination of ideas that the person uses count.


It doesn't matter, when you know the bone structure of the stories you can know if a character will die or not just be his personality and his decisions. You can add what ever you want, but at the end the structure will be the same, which mean I will know how the story is gonna end. I agree, the sweetness of the story doesn't come from the structure per se, it comes from the travel and how everything is done. It doesn't help knowing the 12 hero steps and do them in a story, what matters is the story to be entertaining and complete.

This is assuming that all characters behave exactly like their stereotypes, which is just... Yeah. Overgeneralizing. It's fair enough that we can assume he won't permanently die half way through, but that doesn't mean the entire component is bootlegged just because nobody else does that either.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, the actual story itself is the combination of components, not just a straight list of what components are present.

Bardic-Dragoon
10-17-2011, 07:29 AM
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/moviebob/7190-Trope-a-Dope

Though the point being made isn't wholly on topic, the prologue of this article is something worth considering. Basically it's all been done before, and it no doubt plausible to break it all down to a sequence of generic XYZ statements, but originality is not the key to entertainment, sure unapologeticlly using thee same cliches and what have you won't make a good story, but not using them doesn't make it better.

Which is to say ClockHand is right, but Regantor isn't wrong. I won't say there isn't such a thing as a completely original story, but it will likely take a person smarter than all of us to write it, but rather that a story is good based on how each of the 'already been done' variables mesh and how they all come together with the writers ability to make them seem interesting regardless of what they are, and how often they have been done before.

Fenn
10-17-2011, 10:11 AM
You can disagree all you want, but the fact is that there are universal subjects of stories and those has already been wrote, what we do are re-interpretations. We have Edipo, the struggle between father and son, and we have Luke Skywalker, the struggle between father and son, their motivations are different and how the characters act in the story is also different, but the root is the same, the problem is the same and doesn't matter how many sci-fi shit you put in there, the concept will be still the same, and even the structure of the story is the same (12 steps of the hero YAHY!!!).

Another example: Naruto has to become stronger to defeat his enemy/Goku has to become stronger to defeat his enemy/hero has to become stronger to defeat his enemy = Heracles. Actually is funny, because shonen comics are the most obvious copy paste of the 12 step of the hero in a Heracles-kind.



The plot will always be unoriginal because we create what we can know. If I don't know something I can't create something that look like it. If I don't know a kind of story, I will not be able to recreate the story. Which mean I will never be original, because every story I made is based on something I experienced (read, life, saw, etc). Also, when you claim that there is originality, then you are also claiming that if someone made a story that look like the other is ripping off the original, because obviously he wasn't enough creative and original to not being able to do a better story.



It doesn't matter, when you know the bone structure of the stories you can know if a character will die or not just be his personality and his decisions. You can add what ever you want, but at the end the structure will be the same, which mean I will know how the story is gonna end. I agree, the sweetness of the story doesn't come from the structure per se, it comes from the travel and how everything is done. It doesn't help knowing the 12 hero steps and do them in a story, what matters is the story to be entertaining and complete.

Again, the discussion is about originality, and that, doesn't exist. We (artists, writers, crafter, etc) steal ideas and we made re-interpretations (as you will want to name, giving a twist), but it will only be good if we can make it good.

I think for every story there are a good amount of questions you can do yourself to start writing; "where", will help to know the place, time and context of the story (again the example of pirates). "Who", can help you to know who are the ones carrying the story (hero, antihero, team mates, bad guy). "Problem", what kind of problem does the characters or this world have. "How", who are going the character and/or world interact with this problem. And lastly, "Why", why does the characters/world act as they do.

Also there will be the discussion: Does the character carry the story or is the context? And according of your answer you will choose which one will be more important (still, you shouldn't let at a side the other). And of course you will have to ask yourself: "Who will narrate the story?", obviously you are always going to be the narrator, but, if you chose a character to be the center of the story, you will make more narrow the amount of information that come from the story to the readers (example: in Sherlock Holmes, the story is narrated through Watson, so what you can see, is what Watson see and heard).

LOL fine if you're gonna be so adamant about it, originality doesn't exist! I'll just have to come up with a new word that means "putting together a new story by taking different perspectives, details, etc. and applying them to the basic foundation of stoytelling to differentiate it from other stories and make in interesting!" Because we totally couldn't use the word "originality" for that definition and have everyone except you understand what we meant.

Regantor
10-17-2011, 01:46 PM
THE INTERNET = SERIOUS BUSINESS

But yeah. Fenn is basically right. We are arguing over terminology here. The absolute basic concepts of most modern stories have been used a gazillion times before (which I think is what you are saying), but the twists, changes and combinations that form a stories' own specific merits haven't necessarily.

Fenn
10-17-2011, 07:52 PM
THE INTERNET = SERIOUS BUSINESS

But yeah. Fenn is basically right. We are arguing over terminology here. The absolute basic concepts of most modern stories have been used a gazillion times before (which I think is what you are saying), but the twists, changes and combinations that form a stories' own specific merits haven't necessarily.

Yeah, it's pure semantics at this point. Y'know, I've noticed a lot of arguments on this forum end up boiling down to semantics. Screw semantics.

Psy
10-18-2011, 03:13 AM
LOL fine if you're gonna be so adamant about it, originality doesn't exist! I'll just have to come up with a new word that means "putting together a new story by taking different perspectives, details, etc. and applying them to the basic foundation of stoytelling to differentiate it from other stories and make in interesting!" Because we totally couldn't use the word "originality" for that definition and have everyone except you understand what we meant.
Passive aggression ftw!

It shouldn't matter if everything has been done before because some one somewhere will read it. The more you try to fend off cliches the more likely I think you are to fall pray to them. Make it interesting and something that makes sense and you've done your job. Even a stupid plot could be potentially interesting and good right?

ram
10-18-2011, 04:21 AM
Yeah, it's pure semantics at this point. Y'know, I've noticed a lot of arguments on this forum end up boiling down to semantics. Screw semantics.

I agree so much to the point that I wish this comment should be in reminder to the whole main page in the forum! With a super sticky! or something. I think I'll put this as my signature.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-18-2011, 06:02 PM
LOL fine if you're gonna be so adamant about it, originality doesn't exist! I'll just have to come up with a new word that means "putting together a new story by taking different perspectives, details, etc. and applying them to the basic foundation of stoytelling to differentiate it from other stories and make in interesting!" Because we totally couldn't use the word "originality" for that definition and have everyone except you understand what we meant.
so true...so very true...

Peteman
10-19-2011, 08:00 PM
I like 'what if'. Simply think what would the world be like/ what would happen if ..xyz where the case? And then just run with it. What if all the worlds cups suddenly disapeared. What if fish could fly. What if there was a giant paper plane that you could ride on? Kinda trippy but fun.

Peteman

Fenn
10-20-2011, 02:22 PM
I like 'what if'. Simply think what would the world be like/ what would happen if ..xyz where the case? And then just run with it. What if all the worlds cups suddenly disapeared. What if fish could fly. What if there was a giant paper plane that you could ride on? Kinda trippy but fun.

Peteman

Why did you sign your post when your username is just to the left?

Peteman
10-20-2011, 04:25 PM
Habit, it's like sighning an email.

Fenn
10-20-2011, 08:57 PM
Habit, it's like sighning an email.

Okey dokey.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-20-2011, 09:15 PM
I finished the first chapter of my manga, and will now be able to come up with a unique plot! YEA!!!

ram
10-20-2011, 11:07 PM
Okey dokey.
Why do you qoute when the person your talking to is just above?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-20-2011, 11:18 PM
why does everyone keep asking questions about peoples life and forum procedures?

Bacon_Barbarian
10-21-2011, 03:24 AM
why does everyone keep asking questions about peoples life and forum procedures?

Why would you ask that?

Fenn
10-21-2011, 10:53 PM
Why do the last three posts begin with "why"?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-23-2011, 12:15 AM
Why did Rio create Mangatutorials? The world may never know~

indescribable
10-23-2011, 12:56 AM
What is wrong with you people.

Also, someone should write a story about what life would be like if this guy ruled the world. Seriously, I don't even care if it's 'been done', just do it. *language warning*


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_XiA4U_XsE

ram
10-24-2011, 12:02 AM
Why did Rio create Mangatutorials? The world may never know~

There was this legend about a man that will join a site that makes tutorials about manga, It is said that he is so great that his manga will become the best of all time! then there was a messenger that comes into Rio's home and said "Make a Website and there the one legendary mangaka will join"

Then Rio replied, "How will I know who this person is?"

The messenger said with a very soft voice, "His name does not start with capital letter, and it starts with "r" and last clue is his name is "ram", and another clue is that he will tell this story in "How to make a plot that is NOT cliche.?", Ok no more clues.

Then that day Rio made the mangatutorials.com, No one still knows when this legendary mangaka will come, and no one really knows if he joined already, but we all know that he is GREAT!!! and HANDSOME!!! and HOT!!!

Fenn
10-24-2011, 04:51 PM
he is GREAT!!! and HANDSOME!!! and HOT!!!

I'm here! I'm here, beloved fans!

GAbRieLWrIgHt
10-25-2011, 08:12 PM
yea, it's definetly you Fenn
:cat_noways:

jubeh
10-25-2011, 08:56 PM
Keep on topic ladies and gentlemen.

ram
10-25-2011, 10:11 PM
Yeah about that, Amaimon what happened to your story? you should've post it by now so we can critique it and make it very original.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-01-2011, 05:02 PM
I have a little bit of plot but not much. Anyways the heroes name is Light Kasane. Don't say anything about Death Note, I had no idea. Anyway's, he lives alone with his mother, because he father died. In the autopsy, the cause of death was completely unknown and had never happened before. His best friend's name is Kamaki Tsuna. They are childhood friends and have known each other since birth. In the first chapter he goes to school, only to fall asleep and be woken by a teacher. The teacher tells him to go home, as he is only a nuisance who doesn't want learn. This is slightly ironic since he has the highest marks ever to be recorded in the Academy. The teacher always says he is the worst student in the school. He goes home, to find a hooded man with a katana assaulting his mother. He becomes angry, and his arm is enveloped in lightning. He then throws a punch that blinds the man in one eye, because of the lightning. Then Kamaki enters his house, anouncing that she is late. She is wearing weird clothes with holes on the shoulders and elbows, as well as the stomach (this is weird because it is not her school uniform. She is also wearing a short skirt with knee high socks. She then tells Light to come with her, as he is in danger. His mother tells him to go, handing him a box that she tells him to open once she reaches his destination. Kamaki then opens a portal, leading Light through. Whenever they go in there is a man with tall spiky hair wearing a black coat with a high collar. It appears to have a metal frame as the coattails stay up, and don't hang around his body. He is holding a staff with a black orb at the top, which appears to be a ringed planet. He points the staff towards them and a black snake is emitted from it and flies towards them. Kamaki creates an orb of fire and dispels it. She then teleports behind him lunging with another flaming orb. He blocks with his staff but the force of the attack breaks the staff causing an explosion of the elements. This irritates Light's strange ability, and he gains extreme speed if only temporarily. He gets behind the assailant and delivers a devastating kick. He then exit's the portal with Kamaki leading the way, leaving there assailant behind. You then see a man talking to a girl named Koshi, telling her to go get Kamaki. The girl then leaves the room by evaporating. Someone knocks on the door, and then enters revealing it is Kamaki and Light. They talk, with Light becoming enraged and kicking a desk, the man, whose name is revealed to be Auro, who easily cut's it in half, with a giant sword with multiple hole's in it. He then tells Light to calm down, that all will be explained in due time. After that he tell's a story about how in ancient times there was a single civilization. This town was centered around a single building, in which lived a man whom everyone called "Mage." He was the very first mage, and the creator of magic. He was a master of all magic from Fire to Water. And could also use God's magic,the magic of the Heaven's and could use Solar magic as well, the magic of Space. Since then there have been only two people who could use one of these legendary magicks. One's name is Akihiro Kasane, and Light's father. He was a master of God's magic, the magic of the Heavens. The other's name is Lenario, and he is a master of Solar magic, and murdered Akihiro. Light then remembers the box that his mother gave him, and opens it. There are two amulets in there. One of them is a chibi doll of himself and the other appears to be a bow, with two arrows crossed behind it. Kamaki tells him they are magical amulets, and he has to course his magic into them. She gives him a short lesson and then he makes an attempt. He fails at first but then after grabbing both of the amulets and trying again, he suceeds. He then transforms into new, armored clothing. His pants are half hakama, half skinnies. He's wearing a breastplate, shoulder pads, and greaves(the wrist ones) that reach his elbow. He has a quiver of lightning on his back, and two chains hanging from his sleeves, each of which has something connecting to it, and each of which has lightning surrounded by it. He is also holding a strange bow in his left hand.

This is pretty much the first chapter in word form...but i'm working on the WHOLE plot, but I'm not done yet

Edit: I was actually going to make a seperate thread for this, you know, with the title of my manga. But I don't have a permanent title yet.


Details: The types of magic are mostly elemental. One thing that is different is that the match ups are not the same. Water CAN beat fire but only if the water mage is stronger. This is because the fire mage could technically make a flame hot enough to evaporate the water. The water mage could also use ice. So the usual matchups don't really matter, so the fight's really boil down to the true strength of the fighter.

Sylux
11-01-2011, 06:43 PM
Don't say anything about Death Note coming from a kid with an avatar of a manga by the creators of Death Note... Anyway to make something non-cliche, start off with a thesis, and an interesting one. If you can come up with a thoughtful thesis, you can make an amazing story.

ram
11-01-2011, 08:12 PM
how many pages is this?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-03-2011, 06:32 PM
how many pages is this?
14, 15, maybe 16. not looking at it right now so i don't remember.


Don't say anything about Death Note coming from a kid with an avatar of a manga by the creators of Death Note... Anyway to make something non-cliche, start off with a thesis, and an interesting one. If you can come up with a thoughtful thesis, you can make an amazing story.
yea, i knew that, but i hadn't watched deathnote yet. Though i will admit that i watched deathnote because of that Bakuman. but i only watched that because the artist is Nobuhiro watsuki's teacher. Otherwise i wouldn't have cared. and i don't really know where the thesis thing came from, but whatever.

Sylux
11-03-2011, 06:38 PM
You don't know where it came from? Jesus, are you outright mocking literature? You're coming off as really ungrateful, you know. If you want your stories to improve, you should take others' advice into consideration. But whatever.

Peteman
11-03-2011, 09:19 PM
I think there may be a misunderstanding as to what he thought you meant by a thesis.

ram
11-03-2011, 09:36 PM
I don't understand how that argument came to place so I'll leave it there.
I don't know if Amaimon is insulting deathnote or just referring the thesis based on his story, but whatever

Anyway, 14,15,16 pages?

how many panels do you have in one page? I'd like to know the maximum

Sylux
11-03-2011, 10:01 PM
Wait--!! THIS GUYS IS AMAIMON?! Oh, snap, sorry for being so rude! Here, lemme explain: Your story needs to say something. You need to come up with one interesting sentence, like: Men never change, they are only bent under pressure. A prime example of that thesis would be A Clockwork Orange. It's a full novel, but it all boils down to one sentence. Get what I'm saying by it?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-03-2011, 10:05 PM
ohhh, i get it now. I'm also sorry for being rude, i didn't mean to be rude, but i just now realized that my definition of thesis was wrong. My definition of thesis made it seem like I already had one, which I don't. This might be weird, since I know a lot of people have read that book on this site. But yea, i get what your saying.

Sylux
11-03-2011, 10:21 PM
Cool! I'm glad we could work it out! :3

ram
11-03-2011, 10:39 PM
Amaimon you still haven't answered my question.

I can't see all of those things happening in just 16 pages, It's just far too fast IMO.
well maybe you can but It depends on your paneling style, if it has a lot of pannels on one page

Fenn
11-03-2011, 11:13 PM
Who is Amaimon and why did Sylux suddenly apologize when he figured out who it is?

ram
11-03-2011, 11:40 PM
That's because were not just forum boys like you lol, We have our own world in the main site. =D

Fenn
11-03-2011, 11:59 PM
That's because were not just forum boys like you lol, We have our own world in the main site. =D

Posts = superiority. Now bow to me.

I was just confused because, re-reading the conflict, if it was anyone but this mysterious Amaimon then Sylux was ready to tear them a new one. Yet, once he realized who it was he retracted as if he just realized he was speaking to an authority figure? Is there some secret society going on outside the forums I don't know about?

jubeh
11-04-2011, 12:04 AM
Who cares. Stay on topic.

ram
11-04-2011, 12:05 AM
lol not really, We have our own kind of relationship on the main site, people doing requests and guiding stuffs, sharing information and so on.

Sylux just realized that it was his one of his friend on the main site he's talking to, that's just it.

Gabrielwright= Amaimon.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-04-2011, 02:20 PM
Amaimon you still haven't answered my question.

I can't see all of those things happening in just 16 pages, It's just far too fast IMO.
well maybe you can but It depends on your paneling style, if it has a lot of pannels on one page

yea i know, i'm trying to draw it out, but my first chapter roughdraft wasn't that long. Also, this is only the beginning. I have NO idea what the main focus is going to be. At all. And I only like Ram because of all of his cute avatars and stuff(jk). But seriously, I need to find out what the main focus will be. Otherwise, I'll get stuck. And I don't want to get stuck. That would be bad.

On another note, at the beginning whenever I said that it was too much like Fairy Tail, you can in fact completely disregard that comment. Because it no longer is.

p.s. Is it possible to go more in depth on the thesis thing? I still don't think I fully understand it. Like whenever you eat Toaster Strudles for breakfast. They don't completely fill you up. You might just have to get a gronaola bar.

Sylux
11-04-2011, 10:09 PM
Sure! For papers, you can go either of three options: exposition, argument, or analysis. You probably have not done this, but in English-speaking countries in our English classes we learn about these three writing styles.

Expository papers are papers where you give detail and background. The best synonym for them is explanation. You'll explain some sort of aspect of something or other in this type of writing.
Argumentative papers are papers where you fight for or against something, and perhaps try to persuade your readers to think as you do (this is the most effective option). The best synonym for them is debate. You will debate with an imaginary opponent in this type of writing.
Analytical papers are papers where you break something down - like an idea, or a behavior, or even a thought. The best synonym for them is study. You'll study your topic through writing, giving weight and reason to your thoughts.


Expository thesis:

People spend most of their time in civilized societies working, socializing, and dying, but never thinking.

Argumentative thesis:

Censorship is intrinsically wrong in its own right; it has no bearing other than negative on a free society.

Analytical thesis:

There are many pros and cons to using a Linux computer, but for a gamer a Windows OS is the best option.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-04-2011, 11:37 PM
that helps. I guess that explains it. I'm still in junior high, so I take language arts instead.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-05-2011, 11:52 PM
So I have now found out what I think the main focus will be.

A magical fractal will eventually be the main focus, though it won't start off being a main focus. It will simply be a myth at first. It will be revealed later on, in the 4th or 5th chapter. A lot of important stuff will happen in that chapter. Hopefully. Anyways they will be trying to keep the main enemy from retrieving the fractal's shards. Sound's a bit cliche, tell me if you agree. Here is what the person telling the story will say:

"There is an ancient legend that has been passed down since the time of the Great Magicians death. It is said that in his old age, on his death bed, he weaved the greatest peace of magic ever created. It is said that he mixed all magic, using a large amount of his two sacred magic's: God's magic and Solar magic. He sealed this magic into a giant crystal, as it was very dangerous. As he went to hide it away, he was intercepted by his worst enemy, Akukou. Akukou was much younger than he, as he had partaken from the Fountain of Youth. He attacked the Great, and in the Great's frenzy he split the crystal into an 11 piece fractal. The spell he cast weakened Akukou, as well as the Great Magician. The latter used a binding spell and sealed Akukou, and with that final spell, he exhausted his energy and died. He had two apprentices who gave him a proper funeral. They were the only ones compatible with the Sacred magic's.His first apprentice learned God's magic, and his name was Akihiro, and his second apprentice was named Kino. He learned Solar magic. Afterwards they searched the world for people compatible with both types of magic, but could not find one. " Later on it is proved that it is real.

Fenn
11-07-2011, 05:40 PM
So I have now found out what I think the main focus will be.

A magical fractal will eventually be the main focus, though it won't start off being a main focus. It will simply be a myth at first. It will be revealed later on, in the 4th or 5th chapter. A lot of important stuff will happen in that chapter. Hopefully. Anyways they will be trying to keep the main enemy from retrieving the fractal's shards. Sound's a bit cliche, tell me if you agree. Here is what the person telling the story will say:

"There is an ancient legend that has been passed down since the time of the Great Magicians death. It is said that in his old age, on his death bed, he weaved the greatest peace of magic ever created. It is said that he mixed all magic, using a large amount of his two sacred magic's: God's magic and Solar magic. He sealed this magic into a giant crystal, as it was very dangerous. As he went to hide it away, he was intercepted by his worst enemy, Akukou. Akukou was much younger than he, as he had partaken from the Fountain of Youth. He attacked the Great, and in the Great's frenzy he split the crystal into an 11 piece fractal. The spell he cast weakened Akukou, as well as the Great Magician. The latter used a binding spell and sealed Akukou, and with that final spell, he exhausted his energy and died. He had two apprentices who gave him a proper funeral. They were the only ones compatible with the Sacred magic's.His first apprentice learned God's magic, and his name was Akihiro, and his second apprentice was named Kino. He learned Solar magic. Afterwards they searched the world for people compatible with both types of magic, but could not find one. " Later on it is proved that it is real.

Magic fractal sounds like a really neat idea. Do you know a lot about fractals or did you just pick it because it sounds cool? I'm not judging either :) , plenty of media use "quantum" and "nano" to make titles sound futuristic.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-07-2011, 08:16 PM
ummm i know the definition, but i don't really understand it :| but i actually got it from the idea of a gif i saw that was a tree fractal on Google+. But anyway's, that's where i got the idea from. I still feel like the part about finding the shards, and the part about them keeping the enemies from getting them is a bit cliche

Fenn
11-08-2011, 12:40 AM
ummm i know the definition, but i don't really understand it :| but i actually got it from the idea of a gif i saw that was a tree fractal on Google+. But anyway's, that's where i got the idea from. I still feel like the part about finding the shards, and the part about them keeping the enemies from getting them is a bit cliche

TIP TIME! Congratulations! You are in one of the perfect positions to make your story creative. Open up that box and step out of it, look that cliche straight in the face and beat it until you can't recognize it anymore! So the cliche is about finding shards and keeping enemies away from them. How can you do this in a way that is different from the usual?

What if, instead of searching for the shards, they decide to follow the bad guy, in a role reversal? In most stories like these the bad guy is always on the heroe's tails, and they have to beat him to it while hiding from his minions and spies; having the good guys stealthily trail the villain and tick him/her off would be something new.

Or maybe someone created fake shards and scattered them about the world to foil those who searched for them. Is this person a baddie, a hero, or a mysterious third party? Are the fake shards useless or powerful? Also, you could take an ironic route and have the bad guy gather all the shards faster than expected, increasing the danger of the conflict.

When all else fails, you have two remaining options: look at the rest of your story and make IT less cliche to make up for this part, or change the idea of collecting shards completely. Hopefully I've given you a good starting point and an idea of how the de-cliche-ifying process can work. "What if?" is your best friend.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-08-2011, 05:18 PM
hmmmm...reversed roles...hmmm fake shards...hmmm....gather all the shards...hmmmm, can i use those ideas....hmmm fake shards by apprentices, hmmm.....enemy gets all the fakes.....fakes are powerful

Sylux
11-08-2011, 06:14 PM
Yeah make the bad guy get the shards and then rule the world and the main character die in an epic battle then introduce a new main character who'll save the world which is now enslaved

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-08-2011, 07:24 PM
did you not get my flow? i was mushing all the ideas into one delcous morsel

Sylux
11-08-2011, 07:41 PM
Emotional death of an established central character is a good plot device just sayin

Fenn
11-08-2011, 09:44 PM
hmmmm...reversed roles...hmmm fake shards...hmmm....gather all the shards...hmmmm, can i use those ideas....hmmm fake shards by apprentices, hmmm.....enemy gets all the fakes.....fakes are powerful

Glad you likes my ideas, but before you swoop down like a vulture, did you get the point I was making?


Emotional death of an established central character is a good plot device just sayin

I was thinking a series of books centered around a villain and every new entry in the series is a hero who fails to kill him and dies until the final one succeeds would be cool. <<<super-run-on right there.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-09-2011, 04:00 PM
actually no i didn't get your point. but i did ACTUALLY get an original idea from those. but of course i was acting a bit vulture-ish, but I was jus' jokin...speaking of the new original idea...

The God apprentice has a special magic that can keep anyone alive for 1000 years longer, but it is at the sacrifice of the casters life. The Solar magic apprentice has a spell that can bring one person back to life, at no expense. So the god apprentice uses the magic on the other other one, and is revived, and then he uses it on himself, but it works for only 500 years, so they are still alive afterwards, because they do that twice, it is 1500 years later. They call themselves the "Overseer's." No one knows that they are still alive.

Fenn
11-09-2011, 04:39 PM
actually no i didn't get your point.

*sigh*

The point was to give you a process for developing creativity. Read the post over and see if you can pick up MY flow.


The God apprentice has a special magic that can keep anyone alive for 1000 years longer, but it is at the sacrifice of the casters life. The Solar magic apprentice has a spell that can bring one person back to life, at no expense. So the god apprentice uses the magic on the other other one, and is revived, and then he uses it on himself, but it works for only 500 years, so they are still alive afterwards, because they do that twice, it is 1500 years later. They call themselves the "Overseer's." No one knows that they are still alive.

What? They can do that as often as they want? Sounds overpowered, and a very easy writer's trap. Sometimes authors will create these awesome abilities, then forget about them for half the plot, and when it's done readers will ask "why didn't they just use X ability to solve all their problems?"

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-10-2011, 07:26 PM
well there only using them until they find and teach somebody that can be taught one or both magics, and if only one, somebody who can learn the opposite of whichever is learned first. I still don't think i get it, but i MIGHT have an idea, which is

you were trying to help me get my creativity to flow like a river, or something. Or not.

Fenn
11-10-2011, 08:19 PM
you were trying to help me get my creativity to flow like a river, or something. Or not.

Well yeah. Basically next time you find yourself looking to add creativity, you can follow a process similar to what I did.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-10-2011, 08:26 PM
ohhh, i see

Fenn
11-10-2011, 10:10 PM
ohhh, i see

Said the blind man.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-10-2011, 11:02 PM
how did you know that i was blind?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
11-13-2011, 09:44 PM
The Elemental Academy: There are four divisions in the Elemental Academy as well as two sub divisions for each one. I will now commence to tell you about each one.

Fire: Kamaki's school. The people here are usually very strong and consist of brute strength. The element of magic that someone is born with affect's there emotions and attitude.

Sub divisions: Flame warriors usually fight with there bare hands. They can create fire out of anything, and shoot fire out of any part of there body. This sub-division is called Brawlers. Brawlers are the brute strength of the Flame division. The second division uses magical guns that are fueled by flame that the Magicians create. They are the strategic area of the Flame division. Kamaki is the Flame prodigy, and is capable of both.

Earth: Eiji's school(Eiji is a character that is yet to be revealed). True brute strength, no matter what kind of person you are you will most likely be of little intelligence if you are an Earth Magician.

Shape shifters can change the shape of there bodies and weapons, though only the most skilled can change the shape of there body. They can make there arms huge and change them into rock. The other form are the people known as Tunneler's or moles. They can dig at unnatural speeds and hide underground. They can also pick up chunks of the ground with ease.

Air: Auro's school. The smartest of all divisions, they are usually the genuis' of the normal human world. They can be powerful, but they usually aren't. P.s. Auro is.

Amulet magicians can use amulet's that grant them power. Auro is this and his giant sword is an amulet, though it doesn't seem like it. They are usually the powerful ones.

Fan magicians use giant or normal fans that can create powerful winds. So far no character's can use this.

Water: The sly sneaky ones. They are skilled in stealth, though not as much as Lightning.

Shape shifters can't change the shape of there body, but are immune to most attacks. The exception is Lightning, as they can electrocute them.

Wave master's can create wave's using staffs or such, and are extremely powerful. They are NOT stealthy.

Lightning: The SUPER STEALTHY people. They usually use amulets and ranged weapons

Crossbow's: They use crossbows that are engulfed in lightning. Fast, and hard for most to fight.
Throwing knive users can throw there knives faster than most can see. Luckily they don't do much damage as they don't usually engulf them in lightning.

Light Kasane is a special case, he uses a bow that uses arrows of lightning instead of arrows engulfed in lightning.


Battle Mage Academy: The academy for battle mages. there are multiple types of battle mage sub-divisions.

Sword users: They use katanas and there speed is nearly unmatched.
Gun users: They use guns and there sniper skills are unmatched.
Gunsword users: They use gunswords and are the generals of the Governmental army.
Rune users: A more traditional type of magic, they write runes with special pens that make there weapons.

Planetary Mage academy: the fakers who learn strange forms of Solar magic. They are the black mage's of this story. They have white rings around most of there weapon.

Tamer Academy: They can summon demon's and magical monsters. They use staffs and scrolls.

Staff users: use staffs.
Scroll users: use scrolls.

God's magic is the magic of god, a divine magic. It can heal people and kill people. It grants the user superior physicality, and extreme speed. The sign of God's magic is a pure white bird. Strongest known spell is called The Rapture. Can kill instantly or heal instantly, depending on how that person has live there lives.

Solar magic: the magic of the universe, Solar casters can call down stars and planets from space. Strongest known spell is called Ragnarok, and can kill instantly or give slow painful death.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-02-2011, 09:38 PM
Gonna post a new plot here for my one-shot manga that I'm gonna make for practice. Then I'm gonna go back to my previous one.

Title: Sharp Sword
This story is about an eighteen years old named Sodo who is the main character. His main goal is to become the strongest swordsmen in the world. Basically, he goes throughout the world searching for the 13 Legendary Swordsmen. In a world of swordsmen, it is considered a great honor to be one of the 13, and they are the rulers of the world. There is also a rumor that they answer to a swordsmen even stronger than the One, who is the highest ranked out of all of them. He is also said to be the strongest. There were originally 20, but a warrior that no one had seen killed all of them and stole there swords. It starts off with a boy announcing it while selling newspapers. A teenager walks by him with something similar to a shell on his back, with seven swords sticking out of it at different angles. He has one in a scabbard by his side. He is walking towards a castle with large high walls in a gate. He reaches the gate and a giant man with a HUGE sword stops him at the castle gates. The teenager puts his hand on the blade at his waste, and the giant falls, blood spurting from his torso. He walks through the gates, as an alarm goes off. Swordsmen flood the entrance and the courtyard in front of him and scream out a battle cry. They charge him, and as he is surrounded he pulls out the sword at his waste and the one directly behind his head and crosses them in an "X" in front of him. An instant later he is behind the crowd in front of him. Multiple people in the crowd are cut fatally. He spins around and says, "Dark Style: Double Wing." His swords have turned black. The army of swordsmen is scared, and a few try to run. He runs swords out, blades facing the crowd, and cuts through all of them, black streams following the tips of his blade. Anyone near him dies instantly. Soon he has demolished the whole crowd except one. He asks the man whom is not dead how he survived. The man tells him his name, and it turns out the man is the 19th greatest swordsman. The kid throws the sword on the ground in front of the man, saying that it was originally his, until he attempted to kill him. His sword then turns red. He calls it Blood Style. He runs at the man, then disapears. He recieves a cut on his back, as the kid was behind him. They then start clashing blades. The kid swings his sword horizontally at the man, coming from the right. The man blocks, and then the kid pulls out a sword from his left side, and cuts the man from right hip to left hip. He then says that he will make sure he is dead, and stabs him in the heart. He takes the sword back. He then cuts the door leading into the castle into quarters.

(Will finish later.)

Fenn
12-02-2011, 09:49 PM
Now THIS I could get into. First, I'm a sucker for swordfighting stories. Regardless, you've given yourself plenty of potential in this story. 13 Swordsmen, 7 dead ones whose pasts could be important, Sodo the main character, and this mysterious kid who may or may not be Sodo (I can't tell). All with, potentially, their own agenda. If you can design enough memorable characters, you're golden.

You lost me when the man and kid fight. Whose sword was whose before who tried to kill who?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-02-2011, 10:11 PM
You remember whenever the kid pulls out the sword that is straight, directly behind his head? Well that sword was originally the guy he fought who was strong. So he gave the sword back. Btw, it is, in fact Sodo. He gives him back the sword and decides him to fight him with it. He then kills him. Sodo is the "kid":, and the 13th strongest swordsmen in the world. His goal, is like a said, to become the strongest.

EDIT: He is supposedly 14th strongest, but each swordsmen subordinates are stronger than the swordsmen ranked below there master.

Fenn
12-02-2011, 10:19 PM
AH, pronouns! the sword was THE GUY? or the sword was the guy's sword beforehand. And the kid gives the guy the sword, then fights the guy using the sword? Not to be harsh, but stop using pronouns so much. "He he he he he he" does not make it easy to follow.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-02-2011, 11:00 PM
very well...

Here comes the next part, with minimal pronouns, or at least with the smallest amount needed.

Sodo enters the castle, but the swordsmen in the castle are much stronger. Lets just say that Sodo was cut up and tied to a large wooden board that was hung from a tower in front of the whole town. It was to be his public execution. He was charged with hundreds of counts of murder, and killing of the swordsmen without doing a proper duel. The 13th strongest swordsmen floats into the air, and readies his blade. It is a orange blade with a black line that looks like a scar running through the middle. The 13th is dressed in mostly black, a tuxedo, with an orange tie. He points his sword to the sky and swings. The 13th would have killed him, but a black silouhuette flashes by and steals Sodo away. He also grabs the tortiose shell with the swords in it, as well as Sodo's special sword.

Description of Sodo: Sodo has black hair with long bangs, and usually wears a hat, but not always. He usually wears a black sleeveless shirt and black slightly puffy pants. He has a tattoo on his left arm (yet to be decided) and white boots that go halfway up his calf. He has black eyes. Sodo's sword is made of gold, with a platinum hilt. It is very heavy so Sodo is muscled. It has many special qualities, yet to be revealed.

Sylux
12-02-2011, 11:06 PM
Nice sounds like a good Shōnen fight manga how long is this one-shot gonna be?

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-02-2011, 11:33 PM
don't know yet...depends on how long i draw out the story line....he does have to fight a whole bunch of super powerful swordsmen and Sodo will definetly have to train, as he couldn't even beat the 13th lackeys

Evil_Cake
12-03-2011, 05:07 PM
wouldnt a gold sword be pretty weak?

Sylux
12-03-2011, 05:40 PM
Good thing this is a comic book

ClockHand
12-03-2011, 05:58 PM
wouldnt a gold sword be pretty weak?

weak, bad durability, easily hot, bad electrical conductor, etc.

Probably one of the worst minerals ever.

Sylux
12-03-2011, 06:47 PM
At least it looks cool

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-03-2011, 08:09 PM
technically yes, but for my purposes no...if it was normal gold, then it would suck. but it isn't normal. Ill decide why later...(prolly some special kind of gold, or some enchantment or somethin

EDIT: No gold, a special type of metal that is very rare.

Fenn
12-04-2011, 12:41 AM
weak, bad durability, easily hot, bad electrical conductor, etc.

Probably one of the worst minerals ever.

Not when you're trying to impress the ladies...

Bacon_Barbarian
12-05-2011, 12:37 AM
Unobtanium Sword.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-05-2011, 11:46 AM
how long would yall think this should be?

Sylux
12-07-2011, 05:16 PM
You could cram it all into 69 pages, just for the lulz and the one-shot atmosphere

Bacon_Barbarian
12-07-2011, 07:14 PM
69 pages is a damn long oneshot.

Sylux
12-07-2011, 07:21 PM
Well he has a lot he wants to get done

Bacon_Barbarian
12-07-2011, 07:35 PM
Yeah, it might be best if you cut some stuff out. Or decided to do, let's say, 5 shorter chapters.

shadowriku22
12-07-2011, 08:00 PM
Be like me, read more manga than you need to and build that way, then again my brain works like a computer as my manga is constantly updated automatically in my head, no matter what im doing. This means that i miss episodes of my own anime -.-'. Ive currently seen about maybe 100 eps of a 300 or more episode show that is running in my own head. Am I skitso??

ClockHand
12-07-2011, 08:24 PM
Work chapter by chapter. In each chapter you must have a beginning, middle and end, where you expose the idea, conflicts or characters. With this methodology you are going to have easier to follow a structure in each chapter and also as every chapter have a end you can close the whole story if the audience doesn't find it appealing.

Also, please, not just mangas, read about everything. There is people who read few comics a day and that doesn't help that much, you must read everything that fell in your hands (I read 4 news papers, some articles online, comics and books, also movies and tv series or documentals... try to be a sponge of information).

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-07-2011, 09:41 PM
I am. Most of the time. Don't know why, but your comments are always helpful. That to all of you, but almost mostly Clock, but it also goes to Bacon and Sylux. And no, you aren't a skitso, the same thing happens to me. Unless we both are.

Bacon_Barbarian
12-08-2011, 01:03 AM
Well, whatever you do, the best thing is to get started. You're that much closer to completion.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-15-2011, 09:50 PM
CHARACTER BIO #1

Name: Sodo
Age: 18
Height: 5'11''
Weight: 143
Build: Light, Fast, Average
Skills: Can use one or two swords. Master of the Shigemune no kōhai.
Job: Swordsman, one of the Strongest Swordsman in the World.
Key Traits: Black Eyes, Black Hair, White Vest w/ Black bands that keep it from opening. White, slightly baggy pants, black wraps around ankles and shins or the reverse.(Vest on the latter has no bands and stays open.)
HomeTown: Langtow, Shihai
Titles: Goes from 20 to Strongest Swordsman in the World.

Desription: Funny and Sarcastic, loves fighting, but not for blood, for pride. A people-person, everbody likes him, and he likes most everybody else, but not his enemies or people who look down on him. IF somebody is stupid enough to do that, he becomes serious and his personallity changes completly, and he becomes a serious, bad***, cut the crap person. Strategic.

Likes: Swords, collecting swords, legendary swords, sharp swords, women, friends, Yamatori Socki.
Dislikes: Blunt weapons, people who use blunt weapons, enemies.

Fav phrase: "Lets see who has a sharper mind."

Story: Wants to be the strongest swordsman in the world. The only way he can do that is to fight all of them. He meets his best friend Yamatori Socki while heading to fight the 13th swordsman in the beginning. Later he finds out that none of them were dead, and has to re-fight each of them. He later begins to care more about Yamatori and Akemi.

Character Bio #2

Name: Roshambo
Age: 25
Height: 6' 2''
Weight: 159
Build: Lean, Strong, Fast
Skillz: Can use scissor swords. Master of Shizasodo style.
Job: Strongest Swordsman in the world, governer of all the land, above One.
Key Traits: Tall white hair, Black Head piece. Scissor swords.
Hometown: Langtow, Shihai
Titles: Zero, Rock, Paper, Scissor

Description:Serious, no jokes, weird, loves fighting, loves killing, loves completly blowing away his enemies, loves deciding stuff on rock, paper, scissors(can never lose), loves training.

Likes: Scissors, Paper, Skipping stones, Manga.
Dislikes: Sodo, his hometown.

Favorite Phrase: Rock...Paper...Scissors

Story: Used to live in the same town that Sodo did, and was his best friend. He ended up trying to massacre the whole town. He got stopped and banished, which caused him to hate Langtow even more. Trained and fought with Sodo. Helped Sodo with his Shigemune no Kohai while Sodo helped him with Shizasodo. Named style partway after his ex-bestfriend. Killed Yamatori's family, Nearly killed Yamatori and Yamatori's sister Akemi. Eventually used Shizasodo style to become the strongest person in the world.

Saiyagal85
12-16-2011, 06:09 AM
Lots of plots may seem cliched. I would say add a little twist. Yes, the male and female character who used to be friends will fall in love at the end, but perhaps make everything in the middle unique. Lead the audience believing something, then SURPRISE it ends up quite not what they think. The boy still gets the girl in the end. While some of the events in my story or even the plot in general may seem cliched or predictable, I hope that the twists that I add to the middle as well as the characters' unique traits will keep the readers interest.

Sylux
12-17-2011, 12:56 PM
Make the girl die.

Regantor
12-17-2011, 06:19 PM
"Strongest in the world" plots are incredibly tired, cliche and predictable if you ask me. Not bashing you specifically, Wright, but basically everyone seems to go after that sort of "My main character is mega jesus" appeal... It's kinda annoying when everything about the guy is perfect, is all.

Now, what's wrong with adding a little conflict into the character? Like, maybe he's obsessed with being the strongest, but it frequently drives the ones he loves away? Maybe he's feuding with another guy who says he's the best in the world, and the two of them sink to lower and lower means trying to one-up each another? Perhaps he really is a great guy, and he does like everyone, including his enemies, but this often means he's seen as a little dumb or short-sighted? Just a few random ideas...

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-18-2011, 03:08 AM
I was actually thinking that in the end, he would lose the physical battle, but win psycologically causing that leader to change the way the world works. Roshambo is MAIN ANTAGONIST!!! I feel like I didn't convey that enough, which is why Saiya made the reply that they did. Well maybe I did and I'm misunderstanding. I want to mix in some romance but don't exactly know how. Suggestions would be welcome, but ONLY suggestions, not well fleshed out ideas. I like developing stuff myself, and I don't feel like as much as a vulture. I'm wondering if it should be between Sodo and Akemi, or Yamatori and Akemi. Maybe I'll hit up that luv triangle. Of course, they have such an age difference. She will either be Sodo's age or Yamatori's age, whichever I decide will romance it up. Don't know just yet.

Fenn
12-18-2011, 09:34 PM
I was actually thinking that in the end, he would lose the physical battle, but win psycologically causing that leader to change the way the world works. Roshambo is MAIN ANTAGONIST!!! I feel like I didn't convey that enough, which is why Saiya made the reply that they did. Well maybe I did and I'm misunderstanding. I want to mix in some romance but don't exactly know how. Suggestions would be welcome, but ONLY suggestions, not well fleshed out ideas. I like developing stuff myself, and I don't feel like as much as a vulture. I'm wondering if it should be between Sodo and Akemi, or Yamatori and Akemi. Maybe I'll hit up that luv triangle. Of course, they have such an age difference. She will either be Sodo's age or Yamatori's age, whichever I decide will romance it up. Don't know just yet.

Sure, love triangles are fun, but you can always take it farther. Love square, love pentagon, love NONAGON!

Sylux
12-19-2011, 05:06 PM
Add a spicy suggestive love scene without any actual nudity

Fenn
12-19-2011, 06:27 PM
Add a spicy suggestive love scene without any actual nudity

Then his wife shows up.

Bacon_Barbarian
12-20-2011, 01:33 AM
Love dodecahedron?

Sylux
12-20-2011, 02:20 AM
Tetramour?! Decamour, amirite.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-20-2011, 06:33 AM
New Idea: One of the main characters, Yamatori, will use the same style the antagonist uses, except with his own twist. He learned it whenever the antagonist burnt down his village, and he got to watch him fight. p.s Antagonist is brother. He has a close relationship with Akemi because she is only survivor other than himself and Roshambo from the village. He makes her a promise that he will bring him to justice, but they both put a condition on it. Yamatori says he will not use his version of the Rock Paper Scissors style, which, for future reference is called *"Janken." Akemi's condition states that he cannot kill Roshambo, because he was an idol in there village and Yamatori and Akemi both have fond memories.

*Roshambo translates to Janken.

Other idea: The way warriors are ranked is based upon what weapon they use. The lowest of the low use handguns, while there higher-ups use rifles. Above that is the archer. It is above guns because it is believed to take more skill. Above them is the knife. This would not work in any other society, but blades are thought highly of. Next are nagata, long poles with a blade katana like blade on the end. After that you have lances, then spears. They are thought highly of because of the Salamader Knights, the "Royals" personal soldiers. Afterwards there are double-edged swords, and then katanas. The highest weapon of all is one of the "Royals" weapon, which are most important to the society.

Salamander Topic: There is basically a pyramid, with a certain amount of each rank Salamander in the twenty "Royal" towns. It ends up with one Salamander, the strongest rank. 1 Salamander, 2 Commanders, 3 Captains, 5 Guards. In case you don't know, that is a bit of the Fibonacci sequence.

This World is all about Swords, Strength, and Intelligence. *Bakuman reference* This society is basically a monopoly where Strength rules over all. It is, of course, possible to rule with intelligence, or strength, or both, but it has usually been lead by Strength. It is no exception in this story. The leader of the world is also the strongest man in the world. He's cunning, but not overly so. You can't even say he's of average IQ, even though he does have battle smarts. The hero wants the world to be run by intelligence and strength. Swords are in direct cahoots with money, if you have a good sword, you are worth more. In a brief summary, if you have a nice weapon, you have luxiorous life, if you don't you have little chance of ever having one. If you are strong, you can rule and get basically whatever you want, as long as it doesn't contradict what someone stronger than you has said. If you are intelligent, you can attempt to change the world. If you have all three you can.

Bacon_Barbarian
12-21-2011, 12:47 AM
You're tying to avoid cliches and you made the antagonist his brother? lolwut

SuperKasey
12-28-2011, 03:05 PM
You're tying to avoid cliches and you made the antagonist his brother? lolwut

Yeah. . . The first thing I thought of was Star Wars. "I am your fath-- er, I mean BROTHER!!"

This still kinda sounds like a generic shonen to me but there really aren't very many truly original plot ideas out there. However, after a while it's impossible to come up with something we haven't seen before so we all have to cut ourselves a little slack and tell Kasey to shut up. Then feel like you might be getting caught up too much in the details and technicalities of your world. Details and romance are nice but you shouldn't make the story work for them, the details should work for your story. Figure out what the bare bones of this thing are going to be, find your basic exposition, rising action, climax, falling action and resolution and then add your details in around where they will help to flesh out your plot and make it interesting.

Writing stories is a lot like drawing. You lay down your guide lines, add basic shapes and form and the put details in where they are needed.

GAbRieLWrIgHt
12-30-2011, 11:08 PM
*clears throat*

He already knows that the antagonist is his brother, so it's not like Star Wars. As for the rest well...I feel like I got shot. I believe that the reason these things are evident is because I'm developing the story as I go on, instead of already having it fleshed out. But your right. And this will most likely help me immensely.