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View Full Version : Skype Swords & Wizardry: Join us or die. There is no other choice.



jubeh
10-13-2011, 03:13 AM
Cake, clock, john and I are going to be playing swords and wizardry (http://www.swordsandwizardry.com/) on skype on saturday. Its basically a clone of the original dungeons and dragons.

The adventure calls for 4-6 dudes and we only have 3 so if anyone wants to join they just need to get ahold of me on msn (omgjubeh@gmail.com). If you aren't interested, why would you even post in this thread.

To play you must have skype and be able to talk. The rulebook is available at the link above and is completely free. You will also need a program called MapTool (http://www.rptools.net/index.php?page=maptool). Also free.

No experience is required.

Superdooperphailmachine
10-13-2011, 10:34 AM
How similar to D&D are the rules?

Hamachi
10-13-2011, 12:47 PM
How are you gonna get the maps on Skype?

Hayashida
10-13-2011, 01:28 PM
How similar to D&D are the rules?

The rule book is in the OP man just read them.

@ Hamachi: You have skype open to talk with everyone but we use the MapTool program (link is in OP) for actual playing.

Superdooperphailmachine
10-13-2011, 01:36 PM
Couldn't read it from work man.

Evil_Cake
10-13-2011, 01:43 PM
its very much like dnd but an earlier version

Byakuran
10-13-2011, 01:51 PM
I don't now how to play this.

Hamachi
10-13-2011, 03:18 PM
Which edition D&D is it like? d20? :P

Hayashida
10-13-2011, 03:27 PM
It's a clone of the original. srsly you guys all this info is in the OP. rules and how to play are in the OP, version is in the OP and everything else you need to know is in the OP.

jubeh
10-13-2011, 11:06 PM
How does 6 central on saturday work for you guys

Evil_Cake
10-13-2011, 11:11 PM
shld be fine for me

Hayashida
10-13-2011, 11:58 PM
that's 7 my time? I think that should be okay

jubeh
10-14-2011, 10:38 PM
Listen to this song to get into the mood


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVcYsT9WPcs

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 12:18 AM
What a song, James. Is it bad that the thing I'm most looking forward to is getting my hireling caught in a trap?

jubeh
10-15-2011, 12:19 AM
Thats the whole point of the game

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 12:19 AM
okay good. Cuz I'm gonna be doing a lot of that.

Evil_Cake
10-15-2011, 12:21 AM
dont worry i will heal ur hireling before it dies

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 12:21 AM
Don't bother, they're cheap.

jubeh
10-15-2011, 12:22 AM
Psychopathy in this thread.

Evil_Cake
10-15-2011, 12:23 AM
Poolaneous is not the type to let innocents die in front of him

Black_Shaggie
10-15-2011, 12:26 AM
Man...wish I could play with yous guys. I have the books for a while, I can get the map software, allready on Skype...but no mic. (sigh) It's cool though. I'll just wait until Wed. & play Pathfinder with my regular group. S&W is so cool though because it's very much like AD&D(1st Ed)...but it's own game entirely. It's like they took those mechanics [from D&D] and simplified them. Anyways, wish I could play but yous guys have fun!

RPGs are my 3rd favorite thing in the world, right after manga.

jubeh
10-15-2011, 12:30 AM
Mics cost like 20 bucks black shaggie

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 01:05 AM
black shaggie mics cost like 20 bucks

jubeh
10-15-2011, 06:47 PM
Aight guys as soon as I finish dinner I'll be on skype. When you start maptool set the memory to 1024.

Evil_Cake
10-15-2011, 07:15 PM
max mem and min mem?

jubeh
10-15-2011, 07:18 PM
Just max

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 11:35 PM
This was incredibly fun and hilarious though we almost lost in that last fight against the goblins. And we lost the chosen one. Poor Bacono.

Guys, if anyone is still interested in playing, we could use more help, so join us alright.

Evil_Cake
10-15-2011, 11:56 PM
if people join us will they start at lvl one or be 2-3?

Hayashida
10-15-2011, 11:58 PM
idk. We're not incredibly far in the game, so if they started at 1 I don't think they'd be at a huge disadvantage.

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:07 AM
Okay that was way more fun than I thought it would be.

Plot Summary:

The cleric Poolaneus got amnesia for some reason, so his two friends Wolfgant and Efriered decided to take him on an adventure to jog his memory of when he was a badass cleric. They had heard some rumor from people in town that this Iron God has punished his monks and destroyed their temple, but they were more interested in the fact that the temple apparently had a lot of riches in it.

Wolfgang ended up hiring some torchbearers and a fighter. The party convinced the fighter to tie up a farmer and steal his goat, which they took down to the dungeon with them.

Wolfgang forced his torchbearers to lead the way. One, Tint the Horse Thief, fell into a pit trap, but survived. Bacono, the other torchbearer, was knocked unconcious by rats so they put him on the back of the goat until they were able to heal him.

The party ended up bumping into some goblins and an epic battle ensued. Wolfgang was apparently flaccid or something because he didn't do shit. Actually, Tint the Horse Thief killed two goblins with his barehands before dying heroically.

After fighting two bands of goblins the group entered a room with a ceremonial circle. Fearing it was a trap, they pushed Bacono in. He ended up coming face to face with a god, gaining visions and a badass sword. He became the Chosen One.

Realizing they were no longer the main characters of their own story, they tried to protect Bacono's life for the sake of his mission. At this point Efriered decided to tread into the catacombs by himself. He began to suffer hallucinations and was eaten to death by snakes.

The party continued on. After facing a giant statue man, they decided to stand outside the door and throw explosives at it destroying him but also all the treasures inside.

Upon finding a bowl of silver coins, the hirling dwarf, Pheelver, decided to snatch it all and make a run for it. Unfortunately for him the coins were a trap and began to weigh an extreme amount dropping him to the ground. At first the party wanted to kill him, but they decided that he had learned his lesson. He proved to be instrumental in their next fight.

They stumbled into the final goblin lair. Three of them managed to walk in stealthily when Bacono bursted into the room and screamed, "I am the Chosen One! Face your Destiny!"

Thus began their final battle of the day. They killed 18 goblins, but Bacono was felled by a goblin shaman who repeatedly hit him the the groin with his staff. Afterward Poolaneus would take up the sword and continue Bacono's quest and perhaps recover his memories.

Evil_Cake
10-16-2011, 12:18 AM
+ they got an asston of treasure

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:21 AM
I miss Bacono

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:25 AM
What I learned:
-The map doesn't work. We relied on it too much. Next time we may just use the map for combat.
-I should probably learn the rules better for the sake of consistency.
-The players should be responsible for their hit charts and saving throws. I shouldn't have to look that stuff up as the dm.
-I shouldn't tolerate people trying to disrupt the game. It took way too much time when clock decided to split the party.
-Wolfgang needs better armor
-DMing is really hard when everyone can see your dice rolls.
-I can barely pronounced the word Pheelver


Funny stuff that happened:
-Random npc became the chosen one
-Clock rolled a critical failure trying to kill a goat and would have killed himself if I didn't let him get away with it.
-Cake critically failed a high five and slapped Pheelver in the face
-Cake took a chance and stripped naked to bathe in a pool based on the advice of a dude who had his hands up a goats ass.

And WE NEED MORE DUDES

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:32 AM
Yeah I should buy some better armour now that I have more money. I should get plate armour while we're in town getting more hirelings which should lower my AC by 6. It's 70 lbs though...

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:34 AM
Hire a dude to hold your stuff and hope he doesnt bail

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:35 AM
okay I guess so

edit: Also guys after tomorrow, I don't work again until friday

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:38 AM
Aight we'll find a day when we're good. We need more guys though we can't just use two.

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:40 AM
yeah

ClockHand
10-16-2011, 12:43 AM
next time I want to be a fighter )=

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:45 AM
How about next time you dont be an ass

ClockHand
10-16-2011, 12:48 AM
http://static.zoovy.com/img/gkworld/W225-H225-Bffffff/B/sb1143.gif

Evil_Cake
10-16-2011, 12:51 AM
next time I want to be a fighter )=

ya fighter is much better at low lvl

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:51 AM
when we go back to town, will there be new people to hire or just the people that we didnt hire before

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:51 AM
I'll roll more hirelings.

Also I'm okay with us using these classes.

http://swcompanion.wikidot.com/resources

Evil_Cake
10-16-2011, 12:52 AM
when we go back to town, will there be new people to hire or just the people that we didnt hire before

idk but we should probably tie up Pheelver so he cant talk bad about us

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:54 AM
idk but we should probably tie up Pheelver so he cant talk bad about us

Dress him up as a goat and give him back to the guy we tied up earlier

Evil_Cake
10-16-2011, 12:56 AM
o shit what if that guy got a mob together to get us

jubeh
10-16-2011, 12:57 AM
iirc it was Pheelver that stole the goat.

Hayashida
10-16-2011, 12:59 AM
Yeah maybe the guy will reward us with another goat for bringing back Pheelver

Evil_Cake
10-16-2011, 01:10 AM
o ya that'd be rad

Evil_Cake
10-17-2011, 04:21 PM
if we are going 2 do it again this week i cant on friday or saturday probably

Hayashida
10-17-2011, 05:12 PM
Yeah I can't either. I'm good until friday and James doesn't work a couple of days so whichever ones he doesn't work would be good to play then I guess

jubeh
10-18-2011, 01:54 AM
Im available tomorrow and wednesday but we dont have enough dudes.

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 01:56 AM
I'm good for either day I think

Sylux
10-18-2011, 04:43 PM
I would but I have a concert :(

Evil_Cake
10-18-2011, 04:46 PM
:cat_tantrum:

Sylux
10-18-2011, 04:54 PM
I've always wanted to play D&D live ;_;

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 05:41 PM
what you can't play tonight? WHAAAT

Sylux
10-18-2011, 05:47 PM
Wait what tonight what

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 05:47 PM
Yeah tonight

Sylux
10-18-2011, 05:54 PM
I'm cool for it actually

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 05:55 PM
okay rad you should talk to James about getting your character made up

jubeh
10-18-2011, 05:55 PM
Whatchu wanna be

Evil_Cake
10-18-2011, 06:36 PM
tonight?? WHAT

jubeh
10-18-2011, 06:37 PM
Idk guys

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 06:37 PM
wat

jubeh
10-18-2011, 11:30 PM
Hahaha.

What an adventure Mark.

Hayashida
10-18-2011, 11:31 PM
good stuff

jubeh
10-19-2011, 01:51 AM
Cast of Characters:
Poolaneus -- The Cleric of Questionable Character
Wolfgang -- The Charismatic Cursed Contracter
Lars -- The Miracle Mender of Mammals

The adventure started at Bacono's funeral where the party decided what to do with his sword right in front of his open casket while everyone there stared in awe. They were approached by Bacono's brothers, Hammo and Porko, who asked how Bacono died. The party explained this in vivid detail, leaving the brothers mouth agape and eyes wide. The party felt it would be best to leave the funeral early.

After reaching the town they bumped into an overly buff magic-user who was pissed that the tavern was closed. Wolfgang wanted to avoid him, but Poolaneus saw use him in and Lars joined the party. After Wolfgang convinced more hirelings to join them, they hatched a brilliant plan to tie up Pheelver and return him to the farmer from the first adventure. Pheelver put up a valiant struggle but Lars managed to put him to sleep, instantly proving his usefulness.

Once the farmer saw Pheelver, he calmly walked over to him and stuck his axe in Pheelver's head and rewarded the party with two goats. They decided to named the goats Bacono and Jozobad.

They soon entered the catacombs, taking three ceremonial robes. Two for the goats and one for their hireling Bunt. The party stumbled into a dark room and heard a mysterious voice but pretty much dismissed it and moved onto the next room. This one had a trapped treasure chest full of sweet loot and a warning written above the northern exit. They sent a goat to go examine the treasure who ended up getting diseased, though Lars cured it. And despite the warning, they went into the northern exit anyway.

They sent in a hireling to make sure the room was safe. All they could hear was screaming and the very audible sound of him shitting his pants. Not wanting to enter the room after hearing that, Wolfgang convinced another hireling to examine the first guy. Once again, pants shitting. After both hirelings crawled out of the room the group saw that they were being followed by some sort of monster. An 8 foot tall humanoid with fangs and claws who didnt seem interested in the party at all.

He actually just followed them around doing nothing for a while until they reached the mysterious dark room when they suddenly heard a fight start that they couldn't see. The party fleed into another room and heard a yelp as if a dog had just died.

Suddenly the eater of the dead came charging towards them with intent to kill. The group tried to throw exploding embalming fluid at him but missed every time and one hireling managed to blow himself up, covering everybody with gore. Wolfgang kept getting hit and becoming paralyzed by the monster but Lars managed to make it fall asleep and they tied it up with some rope. It managed to break free, and paralyze Wolfgang like 500 times.

Their hireling fighter and two of the torchbearers suffered hallucinations all through the fight and were functionally useless, playing mahjong and dry humping each other. Poolaneus realized that the robes stopped the hallucinations and took them from the goats to bring the fighter back to sanity.

Lars attempted to throw darts at it but missed and hit the hireling fighter right in the ass. This same fighter got mauled horribly and died, but miraculously Poolaneus managed to kill the eater of the dead.

After a bit more exploring they came upon a room full of living statues. They saluted the party but then suddenly vaulted at the only hireling not wearing the ceremonial robes. They violently murdered him while the party watched and then the guardians began following the party around to aid them.

They entered the catacombs, finally, being attacked by skeletons and stuff like that. Poolaneus discovered a magical mace and threw his old one away, accidentally hitting a ghoul and pissing it off. After an epic battle, Wolfgang got paralyzed again and they decided to call it a day and sleep in the catacombs. Their sleep was interrupted by a gelatinous cube that managed to paralyze one of the guardians. Somehow, Wolfgang managed to sort of squeeze his sword through the doorway and kill it.

And then sodaspaghetti had to go to sleep.

Hayashida
10-19-2011, 02:00 AM
what an amazing story, mark

jubeh
10-19-2011, 05:29 PM
Think I forgot about zombie clock

ClockHand
10-19-2011, 05:37 PM
)=

Hayashida
10-19-2011, 05:38 PM
Think I forgot about zombie clock

yeah

Evil_Cake
10-19-2011, 07:11 PM
there is a lack of pissing also

Hayashida
10-19-2011, 08:00 PM
Pissing played a key role

Evil_Cake
10-24-2011, 12:47 AM
when are we doing this again, if at all?

jubeh
10-24-2011, 12:50 AM
Im good tuesday and thursday.

Hayashida
10-24-2011, 01:02 AM
tuesday is probably good for me

Evil_Cake
10-24-2011, 01:06 AM
TUESDAY THATS THE ONE DAY THAT WONT WORK

nvm its fine

jubeh
10-24-2011, 01:17 AM
If we can't get sodaspaghetti on do you guys want to try the 4th edition intro adventure thing

Edit; Wait nvm the adventure is balanced for 5 dudes

Sylux
10-24-2011, 06:13 AM
Tuesday I'm good but on Thursday I can't make it until about 6.30

jubeh
10-24-2011, 01:56 PM
Tuesday then

Evil_Cake
10-24-2011, 02:30 PM
wat time

jubeh
10-24-2011, 02:38 PM
idk if sylux still has a bed time it should probably be earlier than usual.

Evil_Cake
10-25-2011, 12:26 PM
what time we doing this? also beware of dinner

Hayashida
10-25-2011, 03:35 PM
Guys I'm really sorry but they called me in to work today so I can't make it.

jubeh
10-25-2011, 03:39 PM
Its not a problem at all john but while you're there could you go die in a car fire and choke on a goats dick thanks man

Hayashida
10-25-2011, 03:40 PM
:(

jubeh
10-25-2011, 06:57 PM
John this is you

http://i53.tinypic.com/34zn3tw.gif

Evil_Cake
10-25-2011, 08:08 PM
jeez

Hayashida
10-25-2011, 11:24 PM
sorry again guys, I was really looking forward to this. D:

Evil_Cake
10-25-2011, 11:26 PM
u responsible asshole

jubeh
10-26-2011, 12:01 AM
John this is you

http://www.gifbin.com/bin/012011/1295544488_mohawk-owned.gif

Hayashida
10-26-2011, 12:10 AM
James that can't be displayed at the moment

jubeh
10-26-2011, 12:18 AM
Trust me it was fucked up and also you suck

Hayashida
10-26-2011, 12:42 AM
wow james

jubeh
10-26-2011, 12:50 AM
Can you do me a huge favor and go get hit by a speeding car

Evil_Cake
10-26-2011, 12:59 AM
jeez chill out

jubeh
10-26-2011, 01:20 AM
You go die too you stinky butt spelunker

Evil_Cake
10-26-2011, 01:31 AM
thats it some1 has to put u down

attack http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/3238342/
dmg http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/3238344/

jubeh
10-26-2011, 01:33 AM
I'm slain

Evil_Cake
10-26-2011, 02:44 AM
Now I can finally go home. *sheaths sword*

Sylux
10-26-2011, 03:07 PM
2moro?